How Squee Is Your Deathmetal?

BabyMetal's "Hungarian Style." What the...?!

My college freshman godson Josh has apparently developed a rather Punk style sense of late, much to the delight of his mother and myself, 80's New Wavers who spent many a 90 Cents Thursday night at City Gardens, being served Kamikazes by the future Jon Stewart and dancing the night away to Thompson Twins; early Sinead O'Connor; Oingo Boingo; Billy Idol; The Plasmatics; The Ramones; The B-52s and so many more. 

Today, Josh's mom shared a link with him on Facebook about the latest Japanese musical sensation, BabyMetal. We all know how insane Japanese pop culture is. We acknowledge and even embrace it, shaking our heads the whole time. BabyMetal somehow struck a nonsensical chord with your Uncle P, and I just loved it not only for its outrageous bizzaro-ness, but also for the earnest performances of its very entertaining trio of 14 -16 year old singers/dancers known as Su-Metal; Moametal and Yuimetal. I haven't found a video for "Hungarian Style" (though I am dying to know how a Japanese Pop/Metal trio might interpret a good old Csardas) but the trio's first big single is below. Love 'em or hate 'em, here's BabyMetal with "Gimme Chocolate!":

How adorable was that? Of course, one hilarious commenter on Jezebel said: "Somewhere in Norway there is a metalhead in corpse paint standing in a forest crying tears of blood.” Yes. And somewhere in southeastern PA, a weird, middle-aged gay man is taking (and hopefully sharing) great joy in the absurdity that is BabyMetal. Of course, this is hardly the first time we've witnessed adorable gals shrieking to the strains of electric guitars gone mad. Remember last season's "AGT" contestant Aaralynn and her lovely little ditty "Zombie Skin?" I sure do:

They're so sweet at that age...

More, anon.
Prospero

The Gayest Thing You'll See This Week (NSFW Version)

This isn't just the Gayest Thing This Week, but probably the kinkiest thing I have ever (or will ever) post.

There are all sorts of folks who fancy fantasy and fetishwear (say that three times, fast). Slick It Up is a company that specializes in clothing, underwear and assorted 'gear' for men who are into such things. Not that I have ever found such items or practices to be particularly enjoyable - the whole thing seems a bit claustrophobic for my taste. And not that I would judge or belittle anyone who is into that scene. Whatever floats your boat, as long as all parties are mutually agreeable and no one gets hurt.

I suppose my biggest misconception about this particular group of people is that they all take it so deadly serious. Have you ever seen a 'Miss Heather' episode of "C.S.I.?" Never has the profundity of B & D been so emphasized as when Grissom and Heather get into a discussion about the diverse nature of human sexuality.

But when I stumbled across the below commercial for Slick It Up, I couldn't help but notice how funny it was. Even the tattoo-skulled French gay porn star Francios Sagat (L.A. Zombie; Saw VI) has his tongue firmly planted in (facial) cheek for this one (probably NSFW):

I don't know about you, but I find it rather refreshing to see fetishists who have a sense of humor. Honestly, if anything about the Human Condition is funny, it's sex. And there's probably nothing funnier than weird sex in outrageous costumes. 

As for Uncle P, there is almost nothing funnier than people in mascot costumes falling down. The stupid, unchanging smile on the face of the mascot head totally belies the look of confusion, fear and disorientation on the face of the person beneath it. I made mention of this on a comment at my dear friend Stephen's blog Post Apocalyptic Bohemian just yesterday, when he blogged about the birthday of Harper Lee. As I shared with him and his reader's, it all started with the scene in "To Kill a Mockingbird" in which Scout runs home in a ham costume, the thought of which I found endlessly hilarious even though it was hardly meant to be funny.

And tell the truth now - can you look at a guy in a black rubber poodle costume and not laugh? I thought not.

More, anon.

Prospero

The Gayest Things You'll See This Week

It's Valentine's Day, so I thought I'd post about love...

Both of tonight's new clips are from Towleroad, for my money the best LGBT blog on the web. Andy Towle and his staff consistently provide the best stories relevant to the community, whether or not they concern LGBT issues.

First up is the trailer for Private Romeo, the story of eight cadets in an isolated military academy, studying Romeo and Juliet. Combining Shakespeare's original text with modern media, Private Romeo may well be the first gay film for the new millennium:

Written and directed by Alan Brown (Book of Love; Superheroes), Private Romeo is hardly the first time Shakespeare has been adapted for a GLBT film. Most recently, A Midsummer Night's Dream inspired a musical I still have yet (but very much want) to see, Were the World Mine:

Oh, what I wouldn't give for a bit of that potion...

Next up, Randy Rainbow once again allows us a peak into his romantic life, as he and Mel prepare to spend their first Valentine's Day as a couple. The fabulous Miss Coco Peru is on hand as Randy's and Mel's couples counselor and a surprise guest stops by. No wonder Randy is so conflicted. Warning - Mel's language is very NSFW:

So there you have it, the state of gay love in 2011. And we wonder why they won't let us get married... well, at least why they won't let Randy get married. 

I hope you had a fabulous V-Day! And remember, if you can't be with the one you love, honey, love the one you're with...

More, anon.

Prospero

A Random Funny Video

I stumbled upon this today while surfing the 'net and just thought it was silly and fun. Enjoy.



More, anon.
Prospero

I Wonder...

These pictures are everywhere, which is why I'm only posting two of them. I'm beginning to think that Johnny Depp does Tim Burton's movies just so he can wear the bizarro make-up. Burton's take on Carroll will either be genius or crap. I'm hoping for the former, but bracing for the latter. Don't get me wrong, I love Burton (hate me all you want). Edward Scissorhands remains one of my favorite modern movies. From Pee-Wee's Big Adventure and Beetle Juice, to Batman and the overly maligned Mars Attacks, Burton's stamp is both indelible and instantly recognizable.

Of course, there's Planet of the Apes (a deeply-flawed movie I still manage to enjoy). And I don't mind repeating how much I HATED Sweeney Todd. Burton managed to transform Sondheim's lush tragic operetta into a cheap horror-show. And no offence, Depp fans (and I am one), but Johnny was horribly miscast. Of course, Depp is brilliant in Burton's arguably best film Ed Wood.

Then again, I am one of a few true fans of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, which follows Roald Dahl's book so much more closely than the Gene Wilder version.

So, we will wait and see. Will Burton tap into the young genius he once was and deliver a dazzling, dizzying Alice in Wonderland, or will he resort to cheap camera tricks, weird makeup and bad CGI ?

JA over at MyNewPlaidPants said that the image of Depp's Mad Hatter looked like "if Elijah Wood and Carrot Top had a baby." I tend to agree with him. It will certainly be the Halloween costume for 2010 (seriously, how many Jokers did you have ringing your doorbell last October 31st?). And of course, I am very much looking forward to the Burton-produced CGI fantasy 9, coming this September. So what do you think?

And now, on a not entirely unrelated note...

I found this on Towleroad. The embedding has been removed, but I can still link you to it. A dear friend of mine is exceptionally coulrophobic. Of course, all of his friends torture him about it (and yes, I am guilty of it, too). So I sent him this link as a bit of revenge fantasy:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AN5YbfFszlI

If I could have embedded that video, it might have ended up as a "Gayest Thing..." post. I guess I'll have to just tag it as "Randomly Funny." I put these items together, because Depp's Mad Hatter certainly carries an air of "Evil Clown." Don't you think?

And how have you been? You know I love to hear from you. Help me through my aforementioned grief, and leave a comment.

More, anon.

Prospero

Christmas in June

So, here it is, June 7th, and I'm listening to Christmas music. No, seriously. I'm trying to choose Intermission music for "Most Fabulous..." which ends Act I with the Nativity and places Act II at a Christmas Open House party in modern-day New York City (you'd be amazed at how much gay Christmas music there is). Why wouldn't I be listening to Christmas music (most of which, by the way, I despise)?

This is my last week to devote 97.99% percent of my attention to my cast, which saddens me. I love them and want to watch them play and help them grow as much as I can. But I find myself devoting more and more time to the technical side of the show, which excites me too, because I'm starting to get into how all the elements of the show will work together as a whole. So, as you can imagine, I am torn and in need of an occasional distraction.

Weekends are light for most of the blogs I read regularly (some don't post at all on Saturdays and Sundays), so I branch out and hit YouTube and funnyordie and any other number of sites I only visit on the weekend or once-in-a-while. Tonight, in a YouTube search for "The Most Fabulous Story Ever Told," I came across this report of a Florida production this past January:

I may have mentioned this before, but we're actually hoping the "good" Reverend Phelps and his clan show up. Their presence is just what may be what it takes for the entire New Jersey LGBT community to fully embrace the JTMF and what we are all about.

Yesterday afternoon was a line-through with most of the cast, and a barbecue/hot-tub/pool party as their reward, after. We carried-on, drank, ate, laughed and tortured each other, as usual. I quizzed my newest find about horror movies (he's good), gave some amazing foot-rubs and further cemented the bonds between us (no, NOT in THAT way, you pervs! ;-0).

There is something truly magical about a cast that not only 'gets" it, but connects to one another so extraordinarily. Either I'm a genius, or I am just a casting savant (though I doubt the latter... I've made more than my share of casting mistakes... lol). In either case, I am certainly the luckiest director on the entire East Coast.

Today was an amazing choreography session with one of the best fight guys around. The Bravest Actors in the World had it down and running at full speed in less than 30 minutes. Props to all three for once again delivering beyond expectations.

Finally, here's something funny. While I am not particularly a fan of Tori Spelling (except in Trick), this clip from her show, featuring Star Trek and "Heroes" alum, Zachary Quinto, is both hilarious and hot!

On that note, I am off to continue (and hopefully, soon finish) work on my soundplot. We'll talk again soon, I promise.

More, anon.
Prospero

PS - I am deliberately not watching the Tonys, because even though I took the time to write this post, I still have 12,546 things to do before the show will be ready to open. "Oy gay!"

P.

The Gayest Thing You'll See This Week

Oh man. I seriously love whoever wrote this MSNBC piece about today's tea-bag tax protest. Obviously, the right-wing nutjobs who organized the whole thing had no idea what the term "tea-bagging" refers to (and if you don't know, you have no business reading this blog - or we need to have a serious conversation...). Anyway, watch the clip (thanks to my friend and fellow blogger, Steven Rader) and then tell me what you think they're really talking about, here:

The sexual innuendos just don't stop. They're going to take a "licking" and a "tongue lashing." "In a nutshell" the "Teabag Mouthpieces" will get "firm support," even though they are somewhat "tight-lipped" about their "personal taste of tea-bagging." They're even going to need a "Dick Army." OMG! My sides hurt. There's got to be a whole "sackful" of double entendres in that newscast! Please, someone call John Waters, ASAP!

More, anon.
Prospero

For Scott & Steven...

And anyone else who enjoys an outrageous laugh. First, this video is possibly NSFW, though it features no actual sex or nudity or profanity. Second, I'm really sorry about the bizarre, farted (I swear to God) cover of "Bohemian Rhapsody." Turning the volume down does not diminish the video (and the music gets old, fast). Ladies and Germs, all the way from a Polish Fun Fair, the "Cock Cock Train:"

I suspect this was part of the town's Carnivale celebration before the start of Lent. It's also reminiscint of the holiday's pagan origins as a festival of cleansing and rebirth. On second thought, a giant peen spurting out fully-formed children doesn't really seem all that inappropriate. Or maybe I'm just a sniggering teen-ager at heart, as is every man I know, gay or straight.

I'll be back in a bit for another small post tonight. Just wanted to make sure I didn't forget to post that clip.

Disney-Pixar Presents: "Frank Miller's '300?'"

I wasn't sure what I was going to write about tonight, unil I visited my old friend, YouTube. And because I had been recently viewing re-cut trailers, it suggested one I hadn't seen before. I was thinking I might do a follow up to the Classic Horror? post from a few days ago, but then found something that took me on a different path toward sort-of the same destination: Mash-up trailers. And for some reason, I found a plethora of trailers which mashed the 300 trailer's audio to any number of other trailers' visulas. Even more interesting was how many Disney/Pixar films get the the treatment. The first one of these I came across was a Toy Story/300 mash-up:

Funny, yes? Well, linked to that mash-up was this one, for Monster's Inc./300:

And it doesn't just work for CGI. Here it is brilliantly realized in The Lion King/300:

It's not even limited to animated films. I can think of any number of westerns and action films that would work, but this Star Wars/300 mash-up is probably my favorite:

And let's not forget those afflicted with "gamer's thumb." Here is Mortal Kombat/300:

But it isn't just mash-ups. I suppose the bombastic trailer for 300 was just perfect fodder for parody, as evidenced by how many there are on YouTube alone. Here is Ninja Asylum's hilarious parody:

Or this immigration-themed parody from The Latino Comedy Project:

Finally, from YouTube poster "mynameisthad300," this delightfully absurd, MST3K meets the British "Whose Line Is It, Anyway?" parody "Where's My Cat?"

So what are your favorite 300 parodies? Or what other movie parodies do you love? Please share any links in the comments. And I promise another follow-up on re-cut trailers, including the one that led me to all this 300 nonsense.

More, anon.

Prospero

Supermacht FTW

An end of the workday quickie. I just found this (via) amusing:



More, anon.
Prospero

Turkish Taffy

While making my daily stop at BoingBoing today, I came across this hilarious gem:

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I looked it up on YouTube because I thought it went well with my recent Superhero posts, but then found a whole bunch of hilarious clips I just had to share. Now, I'm hardly an expert on International Copyright Law, but I must imagine that Turkish filmmakers have little (if any) regard for it, as evidenced by the clips I am about to share with you. First, please enjoy this clip from the Turkish version of Superman:

Apparently, the Turkish Superman is so powerful, he doesn't even need to actually hit you to send you flying across the room. And Styrofoam rocks have absolutely no effect on him. At least he sort-of looks like he could be Superman, unlike his rather chubby Indian counterpart above. Though I doubt he can sing and dance as well. And do Turkish filmmakers have no concept of continuity or scene matching?

Next, please enjoy this clip from the Turkish version of Spider Man, in which Spidey appears to be a villain, rather than a hero:

Who knew that Mexican wrestlers played such a vital role in Turkish superhero movies? And when is the last time you can remember Stan Lee having Spidey strangle a soap-blinded, nubile waif with her own shower head? Let's not forget about those killer guinea pigs!

And the phenomena is not limited to superheroes. American Sci-Fi fares equally as well in Turkey. Here's a clip from "Badi," the Turkish version of E.T.:

Did that rubber alien actually pee smoke? Yikes! And Spielberg isn't the only victim here. Take a gander at this clip from the Turkish version of Star Wars:

Wow! What's the deal with Luke Leapfrogger, there? Mark Hamill should have been so lucky. And I have to wonder who got confused... why is John Williams' Indiana Jones music appearing in a Star Wars rip-off? And more importantly, why do the cheesy sound effects keep interrupting it? Even worse, not only has an entire concept been ripped off, but actual footage from the movie they're ripping off has been randomly inserted, as if no one would notice. Do the folks at Lucasfilm know about this?

Speaking of bad sound effects, here's a clip from "Korkusuz," the Turkish version of Rambo:

I love how what is supposed to be the sound of flesh being punched is the same as the sound of cloth-covered flesh being punched. And as with the Turkish Superman, Turkish Rambo doesn't need to actually land a punch to beat up his enemies. At least the Turkish Rambo is hotter than Stallone. I know I wouldn't kick him out for eating cous-cous in bed.

Finally, and possibly most horrific of all, I present you with the penultimate scene from "Seytan," the Turkish version of The Exorcist:

Santa? Why are you performing an exorcism? Shouldn't you be at the North Pole, making toys for well-behaved Christian children? And what's up with your creepy buddy and his ultra-wide floral tie? Why is beating up that poor girl with the bad skin? Dimi... why you do dis to me?

I can't wait to see the Turkish version of Watchmen (though I doubt we'll see Dr. Constantinople's big blue penis).

More, anon.
Prospero

Superman or Super Dick?

I guess I've been on a bit of a superhero kick, of late. But I posted this (via) on my Facebook page the other day:

My friend Jonathan then promptly suggested I visit superdickery.com, a very funny site that makes fun of superhero comics and mostly goes on to prove just what a dick Superman can be. Here's an example from the site:

Then there's that joke about the country rube visiting the big city for the first time. He goes to a bar at the top of a tall building where he meets a man who tells him that the building is so high that the wind's updraft prevents anyone from falling out of it. To prove it, the man jumps out the window and is almost immediately blown back in. The rube takes him up on the challenge, only to plunge to his death. The bartender then turns to the man and says "Man, you are a nasty drunk, Superman."

And not that these prove anything at all about my theory, there are these two bizarrely funny clips from Funny or Die (language NSFW) featuring an apparently gay Superman:

Superman: Skyscraper Raper - watch more funny videos

Superman Episode 2: Phonebooth Trouble - watch more funny videos

By the way, for some reason, Funny or Die's embed codes don't always work. If you see two black boxes above, just click teh link below each one to see the video. Sorry about that.

And finally, with my apologies to my dear D, here is "Superman Retires":

So, is Superman really a dick? Did I prove anything here? Not in the least. I just wanted to post something I thought was funny. Besides, everyone who knows me knows how much I really love Superman. Even (maybe even especially) in his most recent incarnation:

As always, more, anon.

Prospero

WWJB

In case you're wondering, the title of this post stands for "Where Would Jesus Be?" For many, it's on a piece of toast. Or a cinnamon bun. Or a rock. The official term for this phenomena is "Pareidolia."

My sister lives in western Florida, just outside of Tampa. While visiting her a few years back, she drove me past an office building on which the image of the Virgin Mary supposedly appeared on a window. There were people camped outside the building, lighting candles and praying to what appeared to me to be nothing more than a grease stain. My sister (a self-described 'liberal Born-Again') agreed this was nonsense. Since then, I send her links to every pareidolia story I come across on the Net, and we laugh. Honestly, don't you think if Jesus (or the Virgin Mary) was going to make an appearance, it would be in Times Square or Piccadilly Circus or downtown Jerusalem? I imagine They both probably have better things to do than make Their presence known in a bag of Cheetos. As an affirmed agnostic, I can't help but think it's like looking for homophobia where it doesn't exist. (Sorry - I know - I promised to stop carrying on about that. Just couldn't help myself).

Pareidolia is not limited to religious images. Here's a perfect example - a photo pf the surface of Mars in which we can clearly (?) see a face:

Or how about this one, from my Facebook page, in which Godzilla appears in the clouds:

In case you're wondering what inspired this post, it's the video below (via), a hilarious compendium of local news shows who end their broadcasts with stories about miraculous sightings in ordinary objects, aptly titled "Finally Tonight, Jesus..." Enjoy.

To quote Homer Simpson, "Help me, Jebus!"

More, anon.
Prospero

More Silliness

By now everyone has seen "David After the Dentist," the video shot by a sadistic dad on his way home from his son's dental surgery. And everyone has heard about of Christian "Batman" Bale's recent on-set rant over a technician who walked into his view while filming a scene. This video (via) mashes the two together for some hilarious results. (NSFW)

More silliness, anon.
Prospero

The Weirdest Thing You'll See This Week

I'm not sure what to make of this. It was sent to me by an actor friend, who finds many of the same things funny as I do. It tickled him more, I think. It puzzles me, but it is certainly very amusing. If it's what I hope it is, and not just a stroke of geek luck, then it is brilliantly Kaufmanesque and pure inspired silliness. Clearly the man has a beautiful voice, and I get the Goulet-inspired pompadour and porn-stache. But the toga, the barking and the weird sincerity of the song's interpretation add that perfect soupcon of surrealism that makes me love the Internet so very much. It's "Camelot" as directed by Dali and performed by the inmates of... well, okay, maybe not. What it is, is friggin' weird. And much like the Cheetah Lady a few months ago, it's folks like this that make me feel I'm not quite so insane, after all. I give you a tribute to Robert Goulet (don't say you haven't been warned):

More, anon.

Prospero

I Been Zombie-fied!

Here is a link to a story that made me laugh, a whole lot:

http://pinkisthenewblog.com/home/2009/01/caution-zombies-in-austin-tx/

It also made me ask myself, why are zombies so damned popular? George Romero's 1968 film Night of the Living Dead basically started an entire sub-genre of horror films. Since then, there have been countless imitators and extrapolators. There are zombie clubs, zombie crawls, zombie flash mobs and even zombie weddings. Danny Boyle invented the "fast-zombie" in 28 Days Later and Zack Snyder followed suit in his 2005 update of Dawn of the Dead. Mel Brooks' son, Max, wrote the hilarious "The Zombie Survival Guide" and the overrated "World War Z" (currently in pre-production) and even Romero is at work on his sixth film in the series, currently titled ...of the Dead.

So what is so fascinating about the Living Dead? For me, it's the humor (both intentional and non) that permeates the genre. Dark and grim? Certainly. Hilarious? Without a doubt. Zombie movies allow us to view ourselves in a different light; stripping away the civility and moral decency we afford ourselves and reducing human beings into little more than mindless consumers, bringing about our own destruction through the depletion of our resources. When everyone is dead and there is no living flesh left on which to feed, won't the zombies eventually starve and rot away, giving rise to the Giant Cockroach Society which will eventually rule the planet? But I digress.

I think that it's a case of "We have seen the enemy and they are us." The modern flesh-eating zombie is our worst nightmare - a mindless eating machine intent on one thing and one thing only: eating you. Our souls in question; our violence increased and our hunger insatiable, the zombie represents all that is Id and none that is Super-Ego. In other words, us without self-control, the only thing that truly separates us from the lower species.

Or, maybe we just love seeing some blow-hard know-it-all get torn in half, screaming "Choke on 'em!" as he watches his legs get dragged away.

So, thank you, George Romero, for inspiring a genre and many a nightmare.

More, anon.

Prospero.

The Creepiest Thing You'll See Today

This animatronic "demon woman" was on display at the 1970 World Expo in Osaka, Japan.

Watch it all the way through. It's short, fun and really kind of creepy. I love it now, just as much as I would have at 9. (via)

Rube Goldberg Would Have Been Impressed

The gang at BoingBoing posted this. I couldn't resist sharing.



More, anon.
P

Star Wars?

Here's a hilarious little video of the Star Wars trilogy by someone who's never seen the entire thing. I love the editing and animation. And she almost gets so many things right. Almost. (via)

Star Wars: Retold (by someone who hasn't seen it) from Joe Nicolosi on Vimeo.

More, anon.
Prospero

The Other Gift I Didn't Get

OK - this product's name alone is worth the price. (via)