Lizzie Borden Took an Axe...

Lizzie Andrew Borden

On June 20th, 1892 in Fall River, MA, Lizzie Andrew Borden was found Not Guilty in the brutal axe murders of her father and step-mother. After the trial, Lizzie took the name 'Lizbeth' and she and her sister Emma moved to new home in the pricier section of Fall River. After a falling out over a party Lizbeth threw for the actress Nance O'Neil, Emma moved out the house known as 'Maplecroft.'

No one else was ever accused of murdering Borden's father and her step-mother, though many theories were later presented. And rumors persist that Lizzie killed her parents after they discovered she was in the throes of a lesbian affair with O'Neil. After over 100 years, no one knows for sure who actually hacked Andrew and Abby to death, 

When Uncle P was a child, I knew the silly rhyme:

Lizzie Borden took an axe

And gave her mother forty whacks.

When she saw what she had done

She gave her father forty-one.

Andrew was actually struck 10 or 11 times, while Abby took 19 blows to the head. The crime and subsequent trial was quite sensational and they inspired the rhyme above. It also inspired a 1975 ABC Movie of the Week, The Legend of Lizzie Borden starring Elizabeth "Bewitched" Montgomery; Fritz Weaver; Fionnula Flanagan (The Others; "Lost") and Katherine Helmond (Brazil). The movie posited that Lizzie had actually committed the murders and had gotten away with it. I remember being both fascinated and horrified that the sweet, gorgeous Montgomery could play such a role.

Now comes word (via) that indie darling (and former Wednesday Addams) Christina Ricci will be playing Borden in an upcoming Lifetime TV movie. While probably a better physical fit for the character, I have to wonder if Ricci will be able to bring the same depth to the role as Montgomery, who was nominated for an Emmy for her performance. I remember everyone being shocked at the time by Montgomery's performance back in the day. I hope that Ricci can still still shock audiences 30 years later in a 110 year old story. Regardless, this may well be a Lifetime movie that Uncle P can actually sit through without groaning.

I tried to find a video of the trailer (or at least some of the ABC movie) online, but was unsuccessful. Instead, here's a clip of Montgomery on the Mike Douglas show in 1966:

I hope the upcoming movie sheds some new light (or at least visits some other theories) on the Borden murders. And I hope Ricci can come close to Montgomery's performance in the new film. Either way, I'll be watching.

More, anon.

Prospero

The Gayest Thing You'll See This Week

Liberace and Scott Thorson c. 1979

If you were alive during the 60's, 70's and 80's you know who Liberace was. At one time, the highest paid performer in the world, the flamboyant (though closeted) pianist was known for his feathered capes, fur-lined costumes and mirror-encrusted piano. He was also famously sued by former "driver" Scott Thorson for palimony. Liberace died of AIDS in 1987, denying his sexuality to the very end. Director Steven Soderbergh (Sex, Lies and Videotape; Magic Mike) has turned Thorson's memoir into an HBO movie called Behind the Candelabra. 

The movie stars Michael Douglas as Lee and Matt Damon as Thorson (who claims Lee made him have plastic surgery to make him look more like his employer/lover - though from the photo above, it's obvious Thorson wasn't exactly a 'buttahface' to begin with). I know I've talked about this movie before, but HBO just released a behind-the-scenes making-of video and I though I should share (via):

So, here are a few thoughts:

While I never need to see what Q calls "Michael Douglas' raggedy ass" again, I think he looks pretty good in the clips I've seen. And Damon looks amazing. But... why the need to cast straight actors in these roles? I would have much preferred to see unknown gay actors playing gay characters. Sure, they're both larger-than-life people. But when will actually gay actors (other than the self-loathing Rupert Everett) get to play gay roles in major films (even if they're just on cable)? Critics will undoubtedly plaud Douglas and Damon for being 'brave.' I call BS. While Debbie Reynolds is nearly unrecognizable in her makeup as Lee's Polish mother and Rob Lowe looks like a disco diva pothead, it all smells rather... fake. Yes, the design team seems to have gone out of their way to recreate Liberace's homes, furnishings and costumes. And the script is based on the memoirs of a man who was actually there. But the only other person who knows the whole truth is dead and can't defend himself against any of Thorson's claims.

"But Uncle P, everything about Liberace was fake." Well... on the surface, yes. But underneath there was a real human being who struggled and lied about himself to the world for his entire life. Liberace may have been all glitz and glamor both on and off stage, but I can't help but feel that a glitzy, glamorous movie about him can only do disservice to the real and ultimately tortured man underneath all the rhinestones and fur.

I hope I'm wrong. I hope Soderbergh and company manage to find a way to delve beneath the Swarovski crystals and etched mirrors and give us a real glimpse into the tortured soul of one of the most famous closeted gay men ever. But nothing I've seen so far indicates anything to that effect. I don't subscribe to HBO (I gave up on them after "Six Feet Under" ended), I have several friends who do and I plan on watching at one of their houses. 

Behind the Candelabra premieres on HBO May 26th.

More, anon.
Prospero

The Gayest Thing You'll See This Week

Michael Douglas and Matt Damon in Behind the Candelabra

It's been a while since I've done a "Gayest Thing" post, but I think this movie warrants one. 

I'm still not sure how I feel about HBO's upcoming film Behind the Candelabra. When I was kid in the 60's and 70's (I keep telling you I'm old), Liberace was a huge star, as famous for his diamond-encrusted pianos and feathered capes as he was for his prodigious talent as a pianist. He loved performing and loved his fans, most of whom were middle-aged straight ladies who imagined the fairly attractive son of Polish immigrants could be theirs for the asking. Liberace was so popular, he even appeared on "Batman" as concert pianist Chandell and his evil twin, Harry who goaded Chandell into becoming the villain "Fingers." In real life, Liberace was born with a twin brother who didn't survive and parodies of him often refer to his brother 'George.' His flamboyant life of excess came to an end in 1987 when he died of AIDS-related pneumonia at the age of 67. Though he was sued for palimony by former chauffeur and alleged lover Scott Thorson in 1982, Liberace denied his homosexuality up until his death. Thorson settled out of court for $95K. At one time the highest paid performer in the world, Liberace supposedly made Thorson have cosmetic surgery in order to make him look like a younger version of himself. 

Director Steven Soderbergh (Magic Mike; Contagion) and HBO have teamed up to bring us Behind the Candelabra, screenwriter Richard LaGravense's take on the tumultuous three-year relationship between Lee (as Liberace's friends knew him) and Thorson. Michael Douglas plays Liberace and Matt Damon is Thorson. As seen in the trailer below, Douglas went out of his way to study and emulate Liberace's iconic vocal patterns, while Damon obviously buffed up to play the flamboyant entertainer's boy-toy:

Rob Lowe; Dan Ackroyd; Cheyenne Jackson; Debbie Reynolds; Scott Bakula and Paul Reiser all have supporting roles (all of whom may well prove far more interesting to see than Douglas and Damon) in what promises to be an exploitative and over-the-top movie from one of the most innovative directors in Hollywood. Uncle P is actually considering subscribing to HBO just to see this film, though in all honestly, I'll probably wait until it's on Netflix or available on DVD. 

Honestly, does it get any gayer than this?

More, anon.
Prospero

Adapting Stephen King

Writer/Director Mick Garris is a friend of Stephen King's. He directed the mostly excellent TV version of The Stand; the more-faithful-to-the-novel TV version of The Shining; the direct-to-video version of Riding the Bullet and the TV version of Desperation (which makes no sense without its companion piece The Regulators, which was written under King's pseudonym, Richard Bachman). Most of Garris' versions of King's works are just okay. They certainly can't compare with Frank Darabont's astoundingly good film adaptations of Rita Hayworth and the Shawshank Redemption; The Green Mile or The Mist.

Garris is back with a two-part mini-series version of King's ghost story Bag of Bones airing tonight and tomorrow on the A&E network. Since I rarely watch TV in real time (I love my DVR), I won't be reviewing Bag of Bones until Tuesday. But I thought I'd share my thoughts on Garris' (and other directors') takes on King's works.

King is difficult to adapt to film. His novels often rely on emotional reactions to what is happening on the page, and that's not always easy to convey on film. And while King's plots and premises are often silly, he is quite skilled at developing characters about whom the reader grows to care. When awful things happen to those characters, it's easy for a reader to get caught up in those characters' emotional responses to whatever outrageous things are going on around them. Few film directors have been able to capture that. Brian DePalma (Carrie); Lewis Teague (Cujo); David Cronenberg (The Dead Zone); Rob Reiner (Stand by Me) and - to a lesser degree - Mikael Hafstrom (1408); John Carpenter (Christine); Mary Lambert (Pet Semetary) and George Romero (Creepshow; Monkey Shines; The Dark Half) have all had some degree of success with adapting King's works. And while there are plenty of folks who adore Stanley Kubrick's version of The Shining, I have never been anything less than disappointed with that brilliant film which completely ignores a full third of the novel and makes so many changes to the story that renders it almost unrecognizable from it's source material. None of these movies can compare to Darabont's films in capturing King's intent, though a few come close. And don't even get me started on the many dreadful adaptions of King's novels and short stories, one of which was directed by King, himself.

Garris is limited by what American TV standards will allow. His version of The Shining, while closer to the novel, because of standards imposed by the FCC, omits all of the truly twisted sexual passages King wrote. And while Garris' version of The Stand is quite good (though often miscast), I imagine the proposed theatrical version might be better. Garris is a decent director, and his adaptations of King's novels are workmanlike and serviceable. Still, they don't always succeed in capturing the essence of what King manages to convey on the page. Not to be a naysayer, but I hope he is not involved with the upcoming TV version of The Talisman*, King's brilliant novel co-authored with Peter Straub (another amazing author whose work has been abused by Hollywood).

I'll let you know what I think of Bag of Bones once I've seen the whole thing. In the meantime, here's the trailer:

And here's a teaser trailer (which I've posted before) for a movie version of The Talisman (one of my favorite modern novels, ever) which never got made:

*Which partially takes place in the same universe as King's "The Dark Tower."

More, anon.
Prospero

Forgotten Gems: "Bad Ronald."

My buddy Pax Romano reviewed a 2008 horror movie called The Ceremony over at Billy Loves Stu. At some point, he likened the movie to an ABC Movie of the Week from the 70's. Pax is a contemporary of Uncle P's, though I suspect he is a few years younger. We both grew up in the greater Philadelphia area and are mutual state switchers. Uncle P was born in NJ and now lives in PA, while Pax was born in PA and now lives in NJ. We both adore horror movies and share very similar political ideals. We read each other's blogs and are friends on facebook.

Anyway... Pax's ABC MOW reference brought back a flood of memories of some the best of them. And at the top of the list was 1974's "Bad Ronald." Starring Scott Jacoby (where is he now?); Auntie Mame's Pippa Scott and Dabney Coleman, Based on a novel by John Holbrook Vance, "Bad Ronald "tells the story of socially awkward teenager Ronald (Jacoby) who accidentally kills one his tormentors. His over-protective mother (Kim Hunter) literally hides him in the walls of the house, where Ronald retreats into a fantasy world of his own creation.

When Ronald's mother passes away, the house is sold to a family who have no idea they have a "guest." Almost completely off his rocker, Ronald incorporates the family into his fantasy until this happens. There are lots of creepy peepholes, mysteriously disappearing food and other strange events that don't disturb the parents (Scott & Coleman) enough to cancel their plans for a weekend away, leaving their three daughters alone with a potentially dangerous lunatic living in the walls.

Eventually, Ronald is captured and presumably taken to an asylum of some kind. The body count is very low (this was TV in 1974, afterall) but the creepiness factor was off the charts. It was all my classmates and I talked about for days... Looking back, it's most certainly because the lead character was our age (more or less) and many of us (Uncle P especially) identified with Ronald. There isn't much scarier in life than puberty, except maybe going through puberty while insane. 

There has been talk of a big screen remake of "Bad Ronald" as late as last year, but until it's announced, I won't hold my breath. I have mixed feelings about a remake. It has been many years since I've seen the original "Bad Ronald." My memory may be tainted and or influenced by any number of things, including my own confusing, 13 year-old hormonal insanity. A great script, amazing cast and the right director would tear this story up and scare the hell out of a new generation of pubescent persons. The wrong director would turn Ronald into a mutant or monster of some kind, slashing his way through beautiful teens who have sex out of wedlock. 

If You've never seen "Bad Ronald," I highly recommend it. While the body count is rather low for a horror movie, the suspense is through the roof. "Bad Ronald" may be a bit dated but good suspense is timeless, as seen in the ultimate "bad child" movie The Bad Seed:

Man, do I love that movie! 

Of course, not to be confused with "Bad Ronald" is Andy Samberg's "Shy Ronnnie."

More, anon.
Prospero

Review: "Don't Be Afraid of the Dark"

Bailee Madison in "Don't Be Afraid of the Dark"

Many folks my age and a little younger have fond memories of being scared to death by the 1973 TV movie starring Kim Darby and Jim Hutton as a couple named Sally and Alex Farnham who inherit a Victorian mansion from her grandfather, only to find they aren't quite as alone as they think. But even at 12, I was a jaded horror fan and thought the creatures, when they were finally revealed, were goofy. In the 2011 remake, co-written and produced by Guillermo del Toro, the creatures aren't goofy, but they have problems of their own. But I'll get to that in  a minute.

In the new version, Sally is Alex's daughter (Bailee Madison), who comes to live with him and his girlfriend Kim (in a nod to the original's star) in a creepy Gothic mansion they are restoring in Rhode Island. While exploring the garden, Sally finds the window to a basement no one knew existed and Alex (Guy Pearce) is soon knocking down a wall that leads to a very creepy door and the very creepy basement, against the advice of the handyman, Mr. Harris. The studio of the house's original owner - a famous wildlife painter who disappeared a few days after his young son - the basement is a cobwebby mess and features a bolted shut ash pit, to which Sally is immediately drawn. All this after a particularly gruesome prologue that shows just how the painter and his son disappeared all those years ago.

Sally is lonely and unhappy at having been uprooted from her mother in L.A. She hates Kim (Katie Holmes), hates the house and hates Rhode Island. But when mysterious voices whisper her name and say they'll play with her if she'll let them out, Sally opens the grate (she's apparently a very strong little girl) and unleashes a horde of tiny creatures who really want to drag her down into the grate and (ready?) eat her teeth! In the original, the creatures' existence is never explained. Del Toro and co-writer Matthew Robbins (Mimic, del Toro's English-language directorial debut) have contrived a background for the little creeps that involves fairy folk, a pact with an ancient Pope and the origins of the Tooth Fairy myth. The contrivance is completely unnecessary and serves only as the basis for the equally unnecessary (and hard to watch) prologue. Of course, when the creatures prove to be nasty, no one believes Sally's protestations. Afterall, she's a 'problem' child who takes Adderall and has a history of running away.

Del Toro originally wanted to direct this film, but felt it was too close in theme to Pan's Labyrinth, so he chose to produce instead, bringing in first-time feature director Troy Nixey. But del Toro's hands are all over the movie, especially in the garden scenes and the score by Marco Beltrami (Mimic; Hellboy; Blade II). Nixey's direction is workmanlike at best, relying too heavily on jolts and surprises instead of relying on the atmospheric creepiness inherent in the Gothic-style setting. Oh, there's atmosphere, just not enough of it. And as for the aforementioned little creeps? Most of the scares in the original came from not seeing the little monsters until the end. Nixey brings them out into the light (so too speak) far too soon and the CGI rat-like humanoids lose their effectiveness after the first time we get a good look at them. 

Pearce (Memento) and Holmes (Batman Begins) have zero chemistry and I didn't for a moment believe that they were actually a couple. It doesn't help that Pearce is so much better an actor. Of course, the movie is really about Sally, and Ms Madison ("Wizards of Waverly Place") is actually quite good as Sally. What I did believe was the relationship she develops with Kim, which starts out cold but grows into one of trust, friendship and ultimately, love. 

Don't get me wrong, Don't Be Afraid of the Dark isn't a bad movie. It's a little predictable (especially of you know the original) and a bit draggy in the middle. Genre fans should like it, though I doubt they'll love it, especially given its relatively low body count. Fans of the original are likely to be disappointed, though that's probably because they saw and were scared by it as children. There are plenty of nods to the original, though, including the famous Polaroid flash scene near the end. Don't Be Afraid... was originally scheduled for release last year, but got delayed in the mess following Disney's sale of Miramax. ** (Two out of Four Stars).

And here's the trailer for the 1973 original:



More, anon.
Prospero