Dear Leelah

Leelah Alcorn

Dear Leelah;

Why didn't you ask for help? Why didn't you seek out those who understand? Why were you afraid?

The answer is simple: Superstition.

My heart is broken, once again. I cannot understand a parent who does not truly unconditionally love their children (or those who do not truly grasp the definition of that word).

We've all experienced emotional pain in our lives. Uncle P has seen his own struggles with it and I can remember more than one time when I registered higher than a 7 on the Suicide Scale. But I recognized the need for help and sought it. Even now, I have to say that counseled therapy was the best thing I ever did for myself. Of course, I was well above the 'Age of Consent' when I did so. Still - there can be no justification for anyone taking their own lives because their religion or their families tell them that they are somehow defective, wrong and/or evil just because of who they are.

Leelah was just 17 when she took her life by stepping into traffic on an Ohio highway. last month. She was still considered a minor and by Ohio was bound to follow her religious parents rules and preconceptions. Her parents, while still claiming to have loved her 'unconditionally' have still refused to acknowledge Leelah's own gender identity.

Reach out. Offer an ear or a save haven. Make sure that those who need help, get it! STOP this horrific epidemic!

Share anti-suicide information. Support The Trevor Project; The Tyler Clementi Foundation and/or your local anti-suicide charity. Too many lives have been wasted, Too much potential has been lost.
 


I can't wait until I never have to make this rant again.

More, anon,
Prospero

A Sad Waste of Life

Glad I'm Not the First to Make this Comparison

So, on the day of the 2014 vernal equinox, the Reverend Fred Phelps (one of, if not THE most hated men in America) kicked the bucket. Bought the farm. Expired. Became an ex-human. Oh, wait -- maybe not that last one. Seems like he'd already done that to himself a long time ago.

Westboro Baptist started in 1955 as a branch of a small church in Topeka, where Fred Phelps was the assistant pastor. After his promotion to pastor of the new church on the other side of town, Phelps soon cut off all relations with the founding group. In 1964, Phelps earned his Juris Doctorate at Washburn and became a civil rights activist, defeating Jim Crow laws in Kansas. Somewhere along the way, Phelps lost his mind and became a religious fanatic, forcing his views on his family with threats and beatings (according to many who have since left the WBC, including Phelps' son Nate, now an LGBT rights activist in Canada). Disbarred in Kansas in 1979 and in Federal Court ten years later, Phelps and his followers (now mostly just members of his family) began their infamous picketing in 1991. By 2001, everyone knew the Westboro Baptist Church and their message of "God's" hatred of homosexuality. Phelps infamously told talk-show host (and original Tracy Turnblad) Ricki Lake the he "...worshiped her rectum..." after appearing on her show in 1994. Lake reportedly had Phelps forcibly removed from the studio.

But then a wonderful thing happened along the way... people started to hear and see Phelps' message for the lies and hate it was. A spotlight was shone on their bigotry and people took notice and started to rethink their own thoughts on LGBT people. So that was good, I suppose. 

Last year, a sort of coup was staged at WBC. Phelps, ailing and possibly softening his views, was excommunicated and the church elected a group of 8 Elders while ousting Shirley Phelps-Roper as WBC's official spokesperson. These details are just coming to light after it was announced earlier this week that Phelps was near death.

And while some might rejoice at the news of Phelps' death, I can't help but think of the sad waste of time and energy that was his life. If he and his congregation had spent just a tenth of that time and energy helping those in need as they did spreading hatred, the world would be a much better place.  Meanwhile, the WBC (having learned nothing) has announced that it's business and picketing* as usual for the SPLC-identified hate group. And of course, this could be the next step toward drinking the Kool-Aid -- and how sad would that be? There are still children there, being indoctrinated in hatred by fear. So, very sad...

Still, I can't imagine anyone wants to leave this world known for their hateful, hurtful actions, even if they are insane enough to truly believe they are doing the opposite. I'd like to believe that maybe Fred did soften near the end. maybe even felt bad about he'd done, or at least how he'd done it. I'd like to, but I don't. 

Here's what TMZ had to say:

*On a side note - in a purely self-serving move to generate publicity for JTMF's production of The Most Fabulous Story Ever Told, we tried desperately to get WBC to come protest. Sadly, their protest calendar was already full that summer. 

More, anon.
Prospero

15 Years On...

Tomorrow marks the 15th anniversary of the attack on Mathew Shepard in Laramie, Wyoming. My reaction is a confusion of "It's only been 15 years?" and "15 years, already?" Funny how witnessing history settles in your memory in so many odd ways. I remember crying when Matt died. Most of the world; the compassionate, empathetic and good people; the Humanists and the religious, alike - we all cried when Matt died.

On October 6th, 1998, Aaron McKinney and Russell Henderson lured Matthew from the Fireside Lounge bar, pretending to be gay, supposedly with the intent of robbing him. They drove him to a remote area, tied him to a buck fence and beat him mercilessly with their fists, feet and the butt of Henderson's gun. Matthew was found 18 hours later by a fellow UW student who'd gone off trail while biking. Six days later, Matt died from his injuries and the world cried.

Matthew Shepard was a young, idealistic and full of hope for his future as a social activist. He was attending the University of Wyoming and had joined the LGBT support group. Unfortunately, Matt was literally bullied to death. Along with Anthony Milano; Seth Walsh; Pheobe Prince; Kameron Jacobsen; Bailey O'Neill; Tyler Clementi and so many others. 

Matthew's story inspired Moises Kaufman and the Tectonic Theatre Project to create The Laramie Project, a pastiche of interviews, memories and recreations of the events leading up the attack and its subsequent effects on the sleepy western town and her people, right through to the trials themselves.

Productions of The Laramie Project have often been (and I hate say, will probably continue to be) the source of conjecture, especially in educational situations. Most recently, a production at the University of Mississippi ("Ole Miss") was heckled by at least "20 members of the football team" and others. They supposedly taunted female cast members about their bodies; yelled "f*g" and "d*yke" and were generally disruptive. UM issued a lame apology, though Gay/Straight Alliance groups and allies like Brendan Ayanbadejo are pushing for more.

As part of our on-going campaign to prevent bullying and the unnecessary and premature deaths of so many young people, The James Tolin Memorial Fund presents a one-night only special event, a staged reading of The Laramie Project, followed immediately by a talk-back with cast, director and special guest, LGBT activist and member of the Tectonic Theatre Project, Cathy Renna. The reading will be held at the Kelsey Theatre on the Campus of Mercer County Community College in West Windsor, NJ. Curtain is at 7 PM.

As of this writing, tickets are still available online at Kelsey@mccc.org;  at the box office one hour before curtain or by calling 609-570-3333. All proceeds from this special event benefit The Tyler Clementi Foundation. 

Let's put an end to this epidemic. Educate to Stop the Hate. 

Don't let those whose lives have been taken by hate, be taken in vain. Share their stories. Share your stories. Reach out, but listen too. If you see an act of hatred, say something; call the police; do something. 

I can't help but wonder what Matthew and my friend Tony would think about the massive strides since they've been gone. And how maybe some of those strides might have come sooner, if they were still here. Matt had dreams of being an activist and Tony was a very talented artist with a decidedly twisted sense of humor. What might they have accomplished in these many years? Sadly, thanks to hate, we'll never know.

If you can't make the show, you can always visit our website and make a safe, secure donation via PayPal. Or, watch the excellent HBO movie version and make a donation to your local anti-hate charity. 

So... how do we Stop the Hate? How do we assuage the fears of those who don't understand? With works like this. With art that makes people think differently. With the truth, I would hope. Sadly, everyone's truth is different, to one degree or another. I don't care what you think your version of 'God" says about Queer people (yes, even the Native Americans who venerated us as 'magical' beings - thanks, but as much as gay folk might think we're magical, we really aren't). Different from most people? Certainly? Wrong or evil because of it? Hardly. And of course, I know I'm singing to the choir here, as it were. But it's more and more likely that most straight people know at least 1 queer person, whether they're aware of that person's sexuality or not. 

Progress is being made an astonishing rate and things I never thought I'd live to see are happening all over the country. And while so many places in the world have yet to evolve, I can't tell you how happy I am to see the tide turning, at long last.

More, anon.
Prospero

Ann Coulter: See You Next Tuesday

Miss America 2014, Nina Davuluri

"With their infernal racial set-asides, racial quotas, and race norming, liberals share many of the Klan's premises. The Klan sees the world in terms of race and ethnicity. So do liberals! Indeed, liberals and white supremacists are the only people left in America who are neurotically obsessed with race. Conservatives champion a color-blind society." ~ Ann Coulter

Is it really any wonder that Ann Coulter is probably the most despised woman in America? Not only does she belie her own racist views, she tries to blame liberals for the racism that is obviously not dead in America, despite her claims to the contrary. Case in point:

I have not watched the Miss America Pageant in at least 40 years. I find it sexist, misogynistic and exploitative. So much so, that I broke ties with a an old friend who raised her own daughter up in the pageant system over it's 19th Century ideology. Regardless of how you feel about America's obsession with beauty, Miss America is supposed to represent a decidedly American ideal. When Vanessa Williams was crowned the first African-American Miss America in 1984, the Internet barely existed. There was no Facebook or Twitter and the world was connected solely through the dominant media of the time (i.e. TV). The only controversy surrounding her crowning came later, when it was revealed that she had posde naked for photos with another woman and was eventually stripped of her crown, despite the protests of straight men who found the pictures wildly erotic. 

Flash-forward 29 years. Nina Davuluri is crowned the first Miss America of Indian descent. Her talent was a "Bollywood"-style dance in traditional Indian garb. Beautiful, smart and talented, the winner of Miss New York won based on the criteria set forth by the Miss America organization and was voted the winner by a panel of judges which included two openly gay men (Mario Cantone and Lance Bass); a professional basketball player (Amar'e Soudemire); a concert violinist (Joshua Bell) a millionaire investor (Barbara Corcoran) and a former Miss America winner (Dierdre Downs Gunn). That's about as diverse a panel as I can imagine. 

Still, almost as soon as Davuluri was announced the winner, a bunch of ignorant racists took to social media, spewing hateful and uninformed nonsense decrying the decidedly American winner a "Muslim" and a "terrorist." One Fox radio announcer went so far as to say Ms Davuluri didn't "embody American values." 

To which I can only respond by asking "WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?!?!"

I dare any single White American, in any part of the country, to claim they did not descend from immigrants. Uncle P is descended from Hungarian and German immigrants, none of whom were born on U.S. soil. My paternal grandmother spoke Hungarian, Russian, German, Romanian and English. If she didn't want you to know what she was saying, she'd speak a language she knew no one else around her spoke. Did that mean she was un-American? No. It meant she had something private to say, just as I do, speaking French or Hungarian when I don't want strangers to know what I am saying. Does that mean Uncle P is not an American? Hell, no! I was born here, to parents who were born here. Just as Ms Davuluri was born here.

The America we know today; the America in which we all have the same opportunities; the America I know and love, was built on the backs of late-19th and early-20th Century immigrants, just as the America of the future will continue to be built on the backs of both native and naturalized Americans of today. Truth be told, if you want to get nit-picky about it, the long-oppressed and unfairly displaced Native Americans are the only real Americans. And yet they still suffer from the kind of ignorant racism which is sadly and deeply ingrained in so many. 

I don't claim to have any answers, here. I have no idea how to fix this problem. I just know that it still it exists and only by exposing it, can we overcome it. I hope I live long enough to see the death of racism and the true globalization of society. Sadly, given the current state of affairs, that's a very long time away.

I realize I am hardly the only blogger to rant about this issue today. But I do hope that I am one voice among many who can collectively make difference and perhaps open the eyes of a few of the ignorant. America is known, among many other things, as "The Great Melting Pot" for a reason. Miss America 2014 both embodies that sentiment and reminds us all that few of us are actually indigenous, despite where or when we were born.

More, anon.
Prospero

PS - If you don't know what "See You Next Tuesday" means, ask a savvier friend... 

21st Century Flaws

I have to wonder why, in the second decade of the 21st Century, the majority of our planet's citizens remain a bunch of superstitious, uninformed and downright ignorant jerks.

The Russians have basically declared war on the LGBT community. Muslim nations continue to subjugate women and criminally punish gay people just for being themselves. Republican asshats like Rick Perry refuse to recognize basic Human Rights and fear-mongering jerkwads like Bryan Fischer are allowed to spread hateful lies about Nazis being gay.

I know... I've been on this particular soapbox for a long time. But it's a soapbox I will not step down from until everyone realizes what a bunch of a-holes they're being.

And it's not just an LGBT issue. Middle-Eastern women are still having acid thrown in their faces or being murdered for expressing their autonomy. Children are still being sold into slavery (both sexual and menial). Refugees seeking better lives are still being exploited by farmers, pimps and pornographers. Dictators are using unspeakably awful weapons against their own people. Horrors are still being perpetrated against people all over the globe. Why? It's not like there are no agencies or groups trying their best to put a stop to these atrocities. In fact, there are probably more such groups than ever before.

Sadly, fear; greed and avarice have been part of the Human Condition since the Dawn of Civilization (and probably even before). There will always be people in power who care only about themselves. There will always be people who perpetrate evil deeds for their own gain. There will always be people who prey on the fear of death to fill their own pockets. I fear there may be no way to stop them, short of killing them. And that's awful, too.

No, I'm not saying I advocate Communism. We've all seen how well that system works. I am, however, advocating Humanism. Do what's right because you know it's the right thing to do, rather than doing what someone else says their version of "God" says it's the right thing to do. Treat every person you come across as you would want them to treat you (sound familiar?).

This is 2013. We all should be past this crap and trying to figure out how to feed, clothe and house everyone on the planet we all share.

I have no idea how to fix this mess (well, maybe a few, which many would reject), but I suspect that Education has the best chance of doing so. That and the eradication of irrational religious beliefs. But that just brings us back to fear...

Maybe Global Warming is the answer, after all. Humans seem to be the worst thing to happen to Earth since the extinction of the dinosaurs. I hope the cockroaches will take better care of the planet than we have, once we're gone.

Rant over (for now). More of my usual nonsense, anon.
Prospero

Sex, Lies and Pat Roberston

Pants on Fire

Pat Robertson continues to be one of the worst human beings alive. I'm not saying this because I'm gay. I'm saying this because I am a rational human being. 

Listen, I have no problem admitting I am a Secular Humanist. I also have no problem with people who are religious. I have a dear friend of over 35 years who is an Episcopal priest. My own sister is a devout Christian. Neither of them have condemned me to hell because of my innate sexuality. They take the New Testament at it's word: "Love thy neighbor as thou wouldst love thyself." They also know that many of the things in the Old Testament were written before the rise of Science and Reason.

But there are plenty of uninformed, frightened and honestly ignorant 'Christians' who fall for the kind of fear-mongering their religious leaders use to keep them in line (i.e. 'donating'). These preachers continue to use and abuse the Bible to further their own agendas, threatening their followers with eternal damnation if they don't agree with their vitriol. Among the worst offenders is Pat Robertson, who hosts the "700 Club" (founded by the very publicly disgraced Jim Bakker). Robertson's obviously loony claims include telling a woman whose husband had cheated on her that she should make a home so nice he wouldn't want to stray. But earlier this week, Robertson made what is probably his most insane claim, ever:

"The Stuff" to which Robertson refers is HIV/AIDS. And while there are admittedly a very few equally insane people who do want to infect others and even fewer and even more insane folks who actually seek out infection (more on that in another post, someday), Robertson's story about HIV+ people in San Francisco using special rings to infect innocent people with AIDS is probably the singularly most preposterous statement I've ever heard. And I'm not the only one to think so:

Thankfully, the folks at CBN (The Christian Broadcasting Network) recognized Robertson's ramblings as false and didn't air that particular segment, but that didn't stop his hateful claim from being posted online for everyone to see.

Personally, I don't understand how any educated person in the 21st Century still believes that homosexuality is a product of demonic possession; the result of sexual abuse; influenced by other gay people or a deliberate choice. Having never been possessed, abused, influenced nor having deliberately chosen my sexuality (as has no one else, ever) I find myself both alternately wanting to punch Robertson in his nose, asking him when he 'chose' to be straight and sitting down with him and explaining just how wrong he is.

Here's the thing: As long as there are superstitious, uneducated people, Robertson and his ilk will continue to influence their opinions. Using fear; threats; misinformation and outright lies to propagate prejudice, people like Robertson, Vladimir Putin, the most recent former Pope; the head of the ROC; Robert Mugabe and various Hindu and Muslim leaders will do everything they can to keep their followers from recognizing Truth.

Ignorance is not bliss, folks. It is death. Thankfully, the tide seems to be turning and with the recent SCOTUS rulings, the U.S. is well on the way toward joining the 21st Century in recognizing that LGBT people are deserving the same Human Rights as our straight counterparts. For the first time in my lifetime, I have hope that I will not die a second-class citizen, something I honestly never thought I'd live to see. The times are indeed, a-changing. 

I just hope that those who refuse to accept reality will eventually realize that if they don't grow, learn and accept the truth, they will leave a legacy of ignorance and hate for future generations to scorn and ridicule.

More, anon.

Prospero

Some Truth, Some Justice and One More Thing

Scott "Kill the Gays" Lively. See: Degenerate; D-Bag; A-Hole; Creep

2013 has been quite a banner year for LGBT Equality, both here and abroad. Of course, these strides have been much to the consternation of the extreme right, who continually make claims about the "wrath of God" and the path to the End of Days, yet claim to follow a man who preached "Love they neighbor as thou wouldst love thyself." Jesus supposedly performed attended a marriage but is never quoted as saying anything about it. Nor does he say anything about homosexuality. Yes, he tells his followers to obey the laws of the Torah, but he was Jewish. Of course he would. I suspect that the man depicted in the New Testament would be pretty unpopular with modern extremists. "Hippie scum!" "Tree-Hugger!" "Fag!" (Oh, how I hated typing that word). "Commie Pig!" Still, you know that's what they call modern peace and anti-violence proponents.

I'm not, as you know, a believer. But I understand all and agree with most of the precepts in the New Testament. But they seem to me more instinctive, than anything. Yes, stealing and killing and raping are bad. I don't need a shaman to tell me that. That was my parents' (and later, my teachers') job. And I think they did pretty well. I didn't need to be afraid of eternal pain for not doing the right thing, though I was on occasion the recipient of momentary pain when I deserved it (which was extremely rare and not ever anywhere close to abusive). And the thought of the humiliation of being arrested has kept me from doing anything really stupid. That's not to say I haven't had close calls. I can think of more than a few times I was certain I would be calling for bail money, only to get off with a ticket or warning.

Scott Lively, author of the absurd The Pink Swastika, an "expose" in which Lively (pastor of the Abiding Truth Ministries, which is officially recognized by the SPLC as a Hate Group) claims that Hitler's Nazi's were gay and used their pent-up aggression to kill Jews (or some such crapalicious bovine excrement), has been ordered to stand trial for Crimes Against Humanity for his role in crafting and supporting Uganda's so-called "Kill the Gays Bill." Federal Judge Michael Ponser, ruling the case eligible for trail, said in part: 

"The history and current existence of discrimination against LGBTI people is precisely what qualifies them as a distinct targeted group eligible for protection under international law. The fact that a group continues to be vulnerable to widespread, systematic persecution in some parts of the world simply cannot shield one who commits a crime against humanity from liability."

 This truly is the beginning of the end for the Anti-Equality Movement. I don't know what penal sentence would accompany Lively's conviction, though I know what peni... No! No, no, no! Not going to go there (penile -- ooh, what a give-away!). Damnit! What I mean to say is that even in those "Country Club Prisons," some guys are going to be some other guy's bitch. And you may look tough, Rev, but I'm willing to place $100 on you crying like a little girl the first time your new cellmate bends your legs over your ears.

Someday, a very long time after all of us are gone, superstition will have fallen away to science and reason and none of this will matter.  But that someday is still a long way off (if we don't succumb to climate change before then). What matters now is stopping the people who preach hate under the guise of love, using fear and superstition to keep their followers in line. 

But here's the thing: They are getting desperate. They know that they are losing in the court of public opinion and they are running scared. We saw the same kinds of behaviors in the 60's and 70's when it came to African American and Women's Rights. Sadly, they will continue to moan and complain and paint themselves as martyrs and victims long after they've lost. But they'll eventually die off. I'm just glad I am here to see the start of it. 

Regardless of the trial's outcome, it is unlikely that the poison in Lively will dissipate. He can't bring himself to admit that he might be wrong and suddenly see the error of his ways. He isn't smart enough to evolve and reinterpret what he grew up 'knowing' to be the 'truth.' FDR said it the best: "The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself." We have much scarier things to worry about, folks. Love shouldn't be one of them.

As for Mr. Lively, I hope he is found very guilty (because he is) and that he spends many years living out the prison rape fantasies he's undoubtedly harbored since adolescence, though not nearly as pleasant as he probably imagined. I actually feel sad that he is so filled with hate and fear and can only hope he lets go of them and finds personal peace.

More, anon.
Prospero
.

Orson Scott Card's Game

Homophobic Propaganda

In college, I took an English elective called 'Science Fiction.' It was a fun and easy class, though there was lots of reading. We had to read 4 novels and dozens of short stories. Not that I minded. I was always a big reader and Sci-Fi was my second favorite genre. 

One of the books we read was Ender's Game by Orson Scott Card. Like many novels and movies in the genre, it was about a young warrior who had the potential to save Humanity from the aliens who were threatening our existence. And I really enjoyed it. It wasn't until many years later that I learned more about Card and his homophobic agenda. 

Card, a terrified Mormon who in 2008 wrote: "Regardless of law, marriage has only one definition, and any government that attempts to change it is my mortal enemy. I will act to destroy that government and bring it down…," he later went on to become a board member of the anti-equality hate group NOM in 2009. The subsequent anti-gay subtext of his works since Ender's Game suggests that gay men, specifically, are unnatural and deserve whatever pain and suffering they get, often equating us with pederasts.

Ender's Game (whose evil, invading aliens are called 'Buggers' - so subtle) is about to hit the big screen this fall with a cast of very talented people who should have known better. Hugo's Asa Butterfield; True Grit's Hailee Steinfeld; Ben (Gandhi) Kingsley; Abigail Breslan and Han Solo/Indiana Jones himself, Harrison Ford, are all in the film. And they have all tried to defend it by saying we should judge the art, but not the artist. Really? Isn't the point of art to depict the artist's point of view? Throughout my training as a performing artist, it was always stressed that a work of art was meant to depict the artist's true intent, regardless of how the viewer interprets it.

This past May, Salon.com published an article detailing Card's most heinous remarks, while pointing out the homophobia inherent in his works. Recently, Geeks OUT, an LGBT Sci-Fi fan group, has called for a boycott of the film. It doesn't matter to them (or me) that Card has already made millions from the novel and the movie rights. It doesn't matter that the filmmakers and stars are trying to distance the movie from it's source. What matters is pointing out that Card is a viciously antagonistic homophobe who needs a reality check. 

After the recent SCOTUS decision regarding DOMA, Card tried to do some damage control, saying:

 

"Ender’s Game is set more than a century in the future and has nothing to do with political issues that did not exist when the book was written in 1984.

"With the recent Supreme Court ruling, the gay marriage issue becomes moot. The Full Faith and Credit clause of the Constitution will, sooner or later, give legal force in every state to any marriage contract recognized by any other state.

"Now it will be interesting to see whether the victorious proponents of gay marriage will show tolerance toward those who disagreed with them when the issue was still in dispute."

Tolerance? Seriously? F*CK YOU, Orson! F*ck you so hard you bleed! F*ck you so hard you cry for your Mommy! F*ck you so hard that you finally learn what it means to be bullied and hated just for being yourself! Of course, you won't learn that lesson because your hatred, fear and ignorance have been ingrained in you by a cult founded by an illiterate farmer who convinced a bunch of equally ignorant Rubes that he could decipher a previously unknown ancient language which was revealed to him by an angel on 'golden plates' which he could never, ever show to anyone else.

Wow, that was uncharacteristically mean-spirited on my part. But I'm not sorry.

Here's the thing: If you're going to spend the majority of your life hating a group of people just for being who they are (and declaring war on your government for recognizing that group's inherent Human Rights), you have absolutely no business asking for that group to be tolerant of your hatred or the art you create which reflects it.

Despite liking the book and loving the cast of the movie, I will not be seeing Ender's Game, in any way, shape or form. And I encourage you to not see it, as well. And while I would normally post a trailer or video at this point in my rant, I simply cannot bring myself to do anything which might promote this movie. 

Please don't see this movie. Let it die the death it deserves. Let Card know we will not tolerate his intolerance. Skip Ender's Game and hold out for J.J. Abrams' Star Wars movies, instead. Hell, wait for the inevitably awful Avatar sequels. Whatever you do, let Card and his ilk know that they are dinosaurs living in the past, with little-to-no relevance to modern reality. And while I freely admit that most boycotts don't work, this one may actually send a message to the gayest (and most homophobic) industry in the U.S. Come on... You know Brokeback Mountain should have won Best Picture.

More, anon.
Prospero

Do Boycotts Work?

There was that gay boycott of Coors beer in the 90's. That worked, right? Coors is out of business, right? More recently (and still going on) we boycotted Chick-Fil-A. And they totally went under. And right before that, our boycott of Target took them down. And let's not forget the opposition. One Million Moms' boycott of JC Penney really sent them spiraling into oblivion, didn't it?

Oh... wait. None of those boycotts made a damned bit of a difference to the companies being boycotted. And while as a community, we are much larger in numbers than One Million Moms (with 58,000 followers on Facebook - about 5% of their claimed membership), even we couldn't take down Coors, Chick-Fil-A or Target.

In the light of recent anti-gay politicking under uber-masculine President Vladimir Putin (methinks the lady doth protest too much) and homophobic attacks in the former USSR, LGBT activist Dan Savage has called for a boycott of Russian products. In particular, Russian Vodka. Already bars in Chicago, San Francisco and several other US cities have removed Stoli and other Russian brands from their shelves. In response, the president of Stolichnaya (which operates in Russia and Latvia) has issued a statement decrying Putin's policies, while touting their promotion of and participation in LGBT events all over the world -- except in Russia. He goes on to say that they are a private company with no influence on governmental policies. And he is 100% right.

In the late 70's or early 80's, I remember a call to boycott Chilean grapes. I think it had something to due with the political climate in Chili at the time. It didn't stop me from eating grapes, mostly because I didn't care about the political climate in Chili. And this current call for a boycott of Russian products isn't going to stop people from drinking Stoli or buying gas at Lukoil and will certainly not stop Putin and his homophobic, fascist regime from persecuting LGBT people in Russia. And that's because most Americans don't care about the political climate in Russia. 

Support for Marriage Equality may be at an all-time high in the U.S., but most of us are more concerned with being able to afford the gas to get to work, let alone Human Rights violations thousands of miles away in some frozen wasteland of a country we've always considered "less than." Hmmm...sound familiar?

Don't get me wrong, I'm very concerned about Human Rights violations wherever they are taking place. But we need to take care of those same issues here in the States before we can even begin to worry about the rest of the world. Hate crimes against LGBTQ people are on the rise (I suspect because the homophobes are reacting against recent strides in Marriage Equality). Recent events in NYC (one of the gay-friendliest cities in the world) prove that we still have a long way to go before we are equal -- Just ask the African-Americans who are still dealing with racism 40+ years after the March on Selma. Ask the Latino-Americans who are subjected to documentation searches in certain southern states. Ask the flight crew of Asiana Airlines flight 214, who were subjected to a news report featuring sophomoric parody names like "Wee Too Lo" and "Bang Ding Ow." Ask any West Asian/Muslim person in the US how they've been treated since 9/11. Ask every parent of a child who committed suicide last year because of homophobic bullying. 

Ask an aging gay atheist what the problem is and I'll be happy to tell you. Ignorance, fear and religion are at the root of both homophobia and xenophobia. Putin's policies are backed by the Russian Orthodox Church, whose leader has said (and I'm paraphrasing here, so don't jump down my throat) that Marriage Equality will bring about the apocalypse. Talk about using scare tactics! 

Here's the thing - boycotts are all well and good, despite their ineffectiveness. If nothing else, they raise awareness. And that's not such a bad thing. 

How do we fix the problem in Russia? I don't know. Some are calling for a ban on international travel by Russian officials. Others are calling for UN sanctions. Me? I'm calling for fighting homophobia, ignorance and hate here in the U.S. before we start worrying about the rest of the world. We can't fix problems elsewhere until they're fixed here. And while I am encouraged by how quickly things are happening here, I know we have a long way to go before joining the now 16 (with the recent addition of the UK) countries which afford same-sex couples the same rights and privileges as opposite-sex couples.

I still don't eat at Chick-Fil-A, but I shop at Target. I was never a big drinker of Stoli (there are cheaper and equally good, if not, better vodkas on the market) so I won't miss anything by not drinking their products. Coors has moved on, though I rarely drink beer (and when I do, it's Harp or Sam Adams or a local brew-pub's). In general, boycotts don't work. Want to effect change? Write or call your local representatives (a simple Google or Bing search will get you the info you need). Demand sanctions and actions. Demand changes to your state's laws. VOTE! Voting is the single most powerful tool we have to effect change in government policy, and most of us don't even bother. Become involved. Be a voice for change, rather than whining about what you don't like. Support local and national LGBT charities either by donating money or volunteering time. Whatever it is, just don't sit on your ass and do nothing. That never helps. The video below may (and should) be disturbing.

More, anon,
Prospero

A Few More Thoughts on SCOTUS

The FRC's New Logo. 'call 2 fail'

Hahahahahahaha! On your right is the Family Research Council's response to Wednesday's landmark SCOTUS decisions regarding LGBT rights. And while I will get to the graphic and the slogan in just a bit, I have to ask these morons one question. Assuming there is a "God;" an invisible Supreme Being who is watching everything we do; answering the deserving prayers of the Just... oh. There it is. Don't you think that if God agreed with you (i.e. thought of you as 'Just'), he would have answered your prayers and swayed SCOTUS with some deus ex machina move of some sort? I mean, I don't know - He could have appeared to Justice Sotomayor in a dream as George Burns (or Charleton Heston) and told her she would burn in hell if she didn't stop the satanic queers from destroying an institution which existed long before any currently recognized religion. God answers the prayers of the Righteous and the Just, right? Or maybe Satan is finally winning the war between Good and Evil (The Force is strong with this one..).

No? God's stronger than Satan, isn't He? Or... oh, you're not gonna like this idea, FOXNews viewers -- What if... what if God was answering the prayers of all the good, loving people who knew that this had nothing to do with Him and everything to do with what's right and what's Constitutional. What if God wanted us to win? Where does that leave you? Certainly not joining your loving deity on a higher plane of existence. Don't worry, there'll be plenty of sulfur to cover the smell of you constantly pooping yourself in hell.

And as for the ridiculous FRC graphic and motto... "On our knees for America?" Seriously? We've been there and will go there again, you morons. "I'm in." That's what he said! And the graphic was obviously designed by someone who's spent more than a few hours in an airport and/or Macy's restroom (not that I would have any first-hand knowledge of that... ). The dopes at FRC need a new advertising staff. Or brains equipped with reason and basic human compassion.

Here's a terrific Superclip (via) of Wednesday's events:

And making me even happier, the Senate n my native state passed a bill banning "Conversion (or Reparative) Therapy for minors. It now awaits centrist Republican Governor Christie's signature. Christie, who took full advantage of POTUS' support after Superstorm Sandy, has previously vetoed a house and senate approved bill for Marriage Equality in NJ, saying he'd rather put it to popular vote. And he has responding negatively to Wednesday's decisions. Local scuttlebutt says that even Christie knows how damaging such 'therapy' can be and expect New Jersey to join California in preventing young LGBTQ people from being subjected to the lies, fear and guilt these programs instill in them. 

As for the events of this past Wednesday... Yes, a major victory was achieved but the fight's hardly over. It's a State by State battle now, with a goal of full national Equality within 5 years. I don't see that as unattainable, no mater how many states are dragged kicking and screaming into the 21st Century. I'm sorry so many who would have loved to see this day are gone, but I'm so happy for those who no longer have to live without rights that were previously denied us. No child born after today will ever have to feel ignored by his or her leaders because of who he or she is, or who his or her parents are.

We are no longer 'Less Than' in the eyes of our government. We will never be so again. That's a good thing.

More, anon.

Prospero

The Power of the Media?

America's Moral Downfall?

A certain douchebag politician who never had a chance in his recent bid for President, has managed to use the recent Supreme Court hearings in a truly pathetic attempt to somehow remain relevant. I won't deign to name this particularly loathsome Republican, but I'm not above linking to hilarious pictures and definitions of him. Anyway, yesterday, said D-bag came out and used something Joe Bidenhas previously praised to defame Marriage Equality, 'blaming' the 1998 sit-com "Will and Grace" for the demise of "traditional marriage." Talk about grasping at straws. I won't even get started about how "traditional marriage" has absolutely NOTHING to do with Christianity, since marriage pre-dates recorded history. But his comments got me wondering about how modern media has helped change minds about the LGBT people.

Truly, before "Will and Grace," there were very few positive portrayals of queer folk on TV. Yes, there was that trans character on "All in the Family." But Beverly was murdered in a later episode. Then Jody came along in "Soap," though as progressive as Billy Crystal's character was, he still wasn't portrayed in the most flattering of terms. Even the theatre and films of the time didn't help. The play (and subsequent movie) The Boys in the Band portrayed gay men as tortured, unhappy and unfulfilled. It wouldn't be until 1997, when comedienne Ellen DeGeneres came out both in person and on her show, that a gay character was portrayed in a truly positive light - and it very nearly destroyed her career. The following year saw the premiere of "Will and Grace," the story of a straight woman and her GBF. Often hilarious; occasionally subversive; loaded with double entendres and populated with relatable characters, "Will and Grace" introduced successful (if neurotic) gay characters to middle America.

Sure, so-called 'Queer Cinema' has been around since the 70's, it would be 2005 before a major studio released a film about gay love. Oscar-winning director Ang Lee's Brokeback Mountain was the film we all hoped would open people's eyes. And while it was both a critical and financial success, it really didn't do much to help the cause. Of course, the unhappy ending didn't help. You're gay? Oh, then you'll either die at the hands of homophobic a-holes, or you'll end up alone for the rest of your life. Not very encouraging. And while Showtime successfully adapted the British series "Queer as Folk" into a gay, soft-core soap-opera (followed soon after by The L-Word), the audience for the show wasn't nearly as wide as a broadcast network show. Often naked Bear Richard Hatch may well have been the first winner of "Survivor," but that didn't actually sit well with Maude in Milwaukee.

Another 5 years would pass before there we saw a truly positive gay couple on ABC's "Modern Family." Once again, Middle America found itself with happy and loving gay men in their living rooms every week. 

Still, none of these films or shows were the first to bring up Same Sex Marriage. We have to go back to 1972 for that. Sociologist Alvin Toffler wrote the book Future Shock in 1970, and it was adapted into a 'documentary' (narrated by Orson Welles). I was 12 or 13 when I was first shown Future Shock in school, and I giggled along with my classmates at the scene where two men got married, even though I secretly hoped that such a thing might actually be possible. 

So I have to ask Frothy (who is only 3 years older than Uncle P), is "Will and Grace" truly the first time you got the idea that Same Sex Marriage was a possibility? Or were you so so horribly scarred by a screening of Future Shock, that you felt it your duty to prevent people who loved each other from sharing the same rights as other people who loved each other? I honestly wished I believed in hell, so I could tell him to go there, though it's nice to imagine him roasting in Dante's 8th Level forever.

From Ireland, comes a bit of media Frothy would probably lose his mind over:


More, anon.
Prospero

Before Laramie

1979

This coming October will mark the 15th anniversary of Matthew Shepard's beating at the hands of two troglodytes in Laramie, Wyoming. But this past December marked the 25th anniversary of the murder of my friend and high school classmate Anthony Milano at the hands of two monsters who have yet to pay for their crimes. 

That's Tony on the far-right of the top row, right next to Uncle P (in the white shirt and over-sized aviators) in a photo from our high school senior year in 1979. The future looked so bright for all of us. 

Tony was quiet and shy but very smart and creative and subversively funny. A talented graphic artist with a skewed sense of humor, we spent three years together (with the rest of the good folks in this photo) in our High School Humanities program, led by a teacher who would go on to be the most celebrated High School Theatre Teacher in the country (and the first adult to tell me it was okay to be gay), Lou Volpe. 

About a year or so after this photo was taken, Tony and I ran into each other in a gay bar in Philadelphia (where we were both too young to be, legally), though neither of us was yet willing to admit even to each other that we were gay. He offered to drive me home to my apartment in Northeast Philly (I had taken the train into Center City) and we parted without saying a word about where we'd met. It was a very different time. 

Over the years since then, we'd meet in various places and situations, never once mentioning that encounter. The last time I saw him, I was working a retail job while trying to establish an acting career. It was early December and I was just too busy to take time out to have a meaningful conversation with him. I promised I would keep in touch and brushed him off, too concerned with whatever it was I was doing to worry about hurting his feelings. A week later, Tony was dead and I was wracked with guilt at having dismissed him.

On December 14th, 1987, Tony stopped for a sandwich and a beer at a local bar, where he ran into Frank Chester and Richard Laird, who goaded him into ostensibly giving them a ride home. Chester and Laird were both relatively attractive men. Did Tony think he was going to have sex with one or both of them? Was he too afraid to refuse their request for a ride? Did they ply him with the promise of more alcohol or drugs? Did they intimate they were willing to have sex with him? We'll never know. What we do know is that they led him to remote, wooded area and murdered him in very cold blood. It's still not clear who did what, though it is certain that one of them held Tony down while the other one slashed his throat with a box-cutter (so brutally that flesh was found in the surrounding trees). They then set his car on fire and left him for dead. Chester and Laird were eventually found guilty and sentenced to death, though both of them remain alive and well in Bucks County Prison, filing appeal after appeal.

I remember attending Tony's viewing and seeing his obviously sedated parents; the undertaker's less-than-successful attempt at hiding the damage to his throat in his surprisingly open casket and the dozens of my weeping classmates. It was surreal, to say the least. Tony's mother never recovered and passed away a few years later. His father, a mild-mannered barber, passed away in 2012. His sister, Annamarie, is the last member of the family to survive. She rarely gives interviews or comments on the events surrounding her brother's death. Chester and Laird are still incarcerated, even though Laird was re-tried in 2007 with the same outcome. 

As a whole, the LGBT community has made great strides in the last 25 years. Just this week saw two  historic Equality issues argued before the Supreme Court. Still, I can't help but wonder what Tony might have accomplished in those years, had his life not been cut short by two ignorant, homophobic creeps. Worse still... There are plenty of ignorant, fearful and violent people who wouldn't hesitate to do the same thing to a naive young gay, lesbian or trans person, given the chance.

As children, we're told there are no such things as monsters. Sadly, as adults, we learn that's just not true. Personally, I am usually against the Death Sentence. In this case, I am happy to make an exception. 

Sorry if this post was a bummer but I think things need to be brought into perspective every now and then. As much as we may want to celebrate the eminent demise of DOMA and Prop 8, I think we need to take a moment to remember all that has led up to it. Hate crimes against LGBTQ people are still reported on a daily basis. So many young LGBTQ people are still rejected by their families, bullied by their peers and ostracized by the churches in which they grew up. Suicide among LGBTQ youth remains at an all-time high. It's up to all of us to stop the madness and embrace the idea that we are all human, no matter who or how we love.

More, anon.
Prospero

Shocked?

Michelle Shocked

By now you all know the story of the tragic breakdown of the once-promising alt-folk singer Michelle Shocked, who made a name for herself in the late 80's and early 90's. In the mid-90's (while gaining her greatest success with a song -- "Quality of Mercy" -- for the soundtrack to the Sean Penn/Susan Sarandon film Dead Man Walking), Shocked joined the choir of the West Angeles Church of God in Christ, a Pentecostal church in L.A. and subsequently became "Born Again." Honestly, I thought she'd given up performing, as I hadn't even heard her name in many, many years.

Of course, she got her name back in the press with her horrific homophobic rant this past Sunday at Yoshi, a club in San Francisco, where she declared that she was afraid that Marriage Equality would trigger the return of Jesus and the end of world, telling the audience (who walked out after) to "Go on Twitter and say that 'Michelle Shocked hates fags!'" Since then, 10 out of the 11 remaining venues where she had been scheduled to perform have cancelled her shows and LGBT groups have decried her statement all over the Internet. 

Today, Shocked issued an apology of sorts, stating she was merely expressing the worries of other Right-leaning Christians and the she (like Jesus) loves everyone.

Hmm. Too little, too late, Michelle. Or is it? Before this week, when is the last time you heard her name in the press (if ever)? I'd venture to say that no one born after 1985 had ever heard of her before this week. So I have to wonder... They say "There's no such thing as bad publicity." And Oscar Wilde famously said "The only thing worse than being talked about, is not being talked about." So, my question is, was this a true melt-down or just a publicity stunt? I'm guessing it's probably a little bit of both. The gigs she lost will likely be replaced with invitations to perform at anti-gay rallies for groups like NOM and Focus on the Family, regardless of what she actually believes about gays and Marriage Equality. And she'll be fine with taking their blood money. 

Take it from the voice of experience - performers are whores. Each and every one of us. Most of us are just a little bit classier about it. If this is a publicity stunt, I hope it backfires on her. If it isn't, she's already lost her credibility as an indie folk performer and sent herself on the same path as anti-gay nut-job Victoria Jackson - another has-been, desperately trying to stay relevant in a world that has mostly forgotten her.

I actually sort of feel sorry for both women. Their careers shut down at their peaks; misguided by right-wing religion and desperate for attention, what recourse did they have but to make outrageous statements about marginalized people who are finally coming into their own? In the 1960's, they both would have come out against desegregation and mixed-raced marriage.  Sad, sad, sad, no matter how one spins it.

I can only hope that smart folks will see through the hate these women espouse.

More, anon.
Prospero

Nope! He's a-No Longer de Pope!**

Insert The Omen Theme Here

My Day Job Co-Worker: "The Pope's stepping down!"

Uncle P: "He never should have stepped up."

Other Co-Worker: "You got that right! He should never have been Pope in the first place." 

The single most unpopular Pope in modern history*, Pope Benedict today announced that he is resigning due to his age and health. He is the first Pope to resign in over 400 years. Of course, Benedict had a hard act to follow. John Paul II was the most beloved Pope in modern history; a charismatic man who survived an assassination attempt and exuded kindness. Benedict, an honestly creepy old man with Draconian values turned out to be not only horrendously homophobic but complicit in covering up sexual abuse while a bishop in Germany. Corruption, depravity and hypocrisy are nothing new in the Catholic Church. Perverts, pederasts and murderers have all been Pope, many times over. Of course today, shaman and fakirs hold much less power over rationalism and people aren't afraid to tell the truth, especially when those they were supposed to be able to trust, violated them so personally and so horribly.

Such an historic announcement certainly seems to me to have deeper and exceptional significance in the secret annals of the Vatican vaults. I truly believe that there is a secret being buried that is so explosive, the Church would never recover should it get out. 

Now you know me. I'm hardly a conspiracy nut. But if any organization has reason to conspire a cover-up. it's the Holy Roman Catholic Church. No, I'm not suggesting that that ridiculous DaVinci novel is true. Or that Beyonce's flashing of an Illuminati sign at the Superbowl was the signal to take German Joe down. Of course, Pat Robertson would have you believe 'Nemo' (I still think that's a stupid name for a storm, Jules Verne be damned) is punishment for the states which approved Marriage Equality in November. Hey, Pat. 'Nemo' is nature's punishment for us abusing the environment, ya douche.

Many LGBT groups are happy to see Benedict go. 'Other Co-Worker' predicted we will see a Pope of color next, citing several Brazilian Cardinals on the "short list." Okay. Still, no one should get too excited about real progress in the Church any time soon. The Cardinals are still all a bunch of old men, obsessed with sex because they aren't supposed to have it. What's that saying about the deliciousness of forbidden fruit? Absurd doesn't even begin to cover it.

Secular society will move forward first, and the Church will eventually follow in another generation or two (they'll have to, if they want to remain relevant to the few remaining followers they'll have by then). People are still afraid to let go of superstition, though the tide is turning toward rationalism and reason. It amazed me to see how freeing it was to do so. Life is too short and too precious to worry about what happens later. What matters is now. 

I can't stress this enough: If you are living a lie because some religious leader told you that you were evil; if you are afraid of what people will think of you; if you think your family will abandon you... the worst thing that's going to happen to you is going to happen to every single one of us, no matter what we do. Why not enjoy the very brief gift we've been given to its fullest? Don't hide your light under a bushel (you should pardon the reference, no matter how relevant). Come out and love the life you deserve with someone who deserves your love.

And the next time you complain when you can't get cell-phone reception, think about the kid in some refugee camp who can't get enough food to keep the cramps away. 

Don't live your life the way someone else tells you should. Live it in the way you know you should. Live the way that brings joy to you, those that you love and those who love you back. They are the only ones who matter. Trust me.

So, maybe this video is the big secret. Or the one below:

Oh, how love crazy people. I have no doubt the Pope is evil. Just not in the way these nutjobs have concluded. Benedict is evil in the way that all people who perpetrate mythology as truth; homophobia as righteous and hate as love, are evil.

You have no power here. Begone, before someone drops a house on you!

More, anon.
Prospero

*You gotta be pretty bad to be less popular than a Nazi sympathizer.

**Once a Musical Theatre Geek, always a Musical Theatre Geek

A War of Wit with an Unarmed Opponent.

The following is a true story. The names have been changed to protect our privacy.

(Insert "Law and Order" doink-doink sound here)

I thought I'd said all I had to say about this topic, but then today... 

I have a Facebook friend - a lovely retired lady (let's call her "Claire") - who happens to be a Christian. Claire is sweet and good-natured and I have never heard her utter an unkind word to anyone. All well and good. When she posts religious things, I don't respond. I post plenty of Humanist things. Claire never responds to those. I always respond when she posts travel pictures and such. But today...

Today, Claire shared a link to a Chick Fil-A online coupon with all of her Facebook friends. I hope she shared it in the best of intentions. I can't imagine otherwise. There is truly not a mean bone in her body. I can't say the same for one of Claire's Christian friends. Uncle P responded to Claire's link and Claire's friend (let's call her "Lamia") responded to me, and so on. Here's how it went:

Uncle P: I don't support companies that support hate groups.

Lamia: They don't support hate groups ... They support Gods irrefutable Word in scripture. Get informed.

Uncle P: Lamia, I'd suggest you get informed yourself. They give money to groups which have been officially identified by the Southern Poverty Law Center as Hate Groups.

Lamia: Let's talk about "informed" God is about love, BUT there are rules...hate groups do not like rules. You want to live your life doing what ever you want and go to hell, than go for it. If you want to live life in eternity, there are rules. So, rules=heaven......do whatever you want=the fiery lake.........your choice

Her response has nothing to do with what I said, but then this appears:

Claire: From a Friend: [REDACTED] wrote: "Good suggestion. I went to SPLC's website and searched for Ckick-fil-a. Except for one incident where a man attacked someone while carrying a bag from CFA, there was no mention of CFA."

To which I responded:

Uncle P: I never said that the SPLC mentioned Chick Fil-A. Chick Fil-A is not a hate group. They do, however, donate to several groups on the SPLC's list, which can be found by doing a simple search of Chick Fil-A's beneficiaries. Lamia, I feel sorry that you aren't able to think for yourself and are unable make informed decisions based on true morality, rather than dogma. I am finished commenting on this thread. Claire - I'm sorry to have caused such a fuss.

Trying to have a honest, open and cogent conversation (even on line) with a Wingnut Christian is harder than convincing a top to bottom for the first time (I am getting so saucy, these days!). I've come to realize that such people are very, very afraid to die. Hell, we all are. We just don't admit it to ourselves every day. We'd go mad, if we did. See yesterday's post for my view on that. It seems to me that extremely religious people must fear death so much, that they have to believe in stories that promise them an eternal afterlife. They can't appreciate their life for its own sake. They don't appreciate the majesty in the odds of their very existence. They don't see the beauty of the Fibonacci Sequence in everything that exists. The thought that they may only exist once terrifies them. Instead, they should learn to take joy in the fact that they exist in the first place. It makes me sad to think that people still want to live some parts of their lives based on bronze-age mythology. 

My sense of morality comes out of knowing how rare and fragile our lives are, and doing everything I can to make the lives of not only the people I know and love, but all people everywhere, at least as good as mine. That's what should matter. I can't imagine anything more immoral than a person or corporation who gives money to any organization which actively works to hurt people. How is that 'Christian' in any sense of the word (at least as I was raised to understand it)? I wanted to tell Lamia that she should sell her daughter into slavery and she'd better hope she never let a shrimp pass through her lips, but thought better of it. She wouldn't understand it, I'm sure. And I wasn't about to attack her punctuation and grammar, as bad as they are. I figured I'd let the Grammar Nazi's do it here. Have it it all you GNs!

And Lamia - since you apparently still believe in magic, here's something that will undoubtedly have you accusing the guy of being a witch:

Just so you know, Yann Frisch is Uncle P's newest obsession, even though everything I've found on YouTube seems to be variations on the same routine. It's still pretty impressive.

More, anon.

Prospero