Needing Nonsense, Stat!

Zombie Plumbing Company - Draaiiins. We clean draaiiins!

A little nonsense now and then/Is treasured by the wisest men. ~ Raold Dahl

Before I start, a quick reminder, if you can, go kiss your boy or girl and like it tomorrow night. You know where. Last word on that for a while, I promise.

Things have been grim and angry and shouty and unhappy around here, lately. Time to take it down (or rather, up) a few notches and get our silly on. What say you? Too bad. I've already decided. I hope the Copyranter Mark Duffy sees that pic. Hell, I'm sending it to him. There. Done. Let's see if he posts it. So what other kinds of nonsense can we get up to tonight?

Oh - how about assorted Olympics nonsense? 8 Women's Badminton players from three different Asian countries were disqualified for deliberately playing badly in order to manipulate the teams they would play in future matches. What kind of moron cheats at the Olympics? It's not like cheating on a 5th grade math test. This is on a global scale. Literally the entire world knows what they did. They've not only shamed themselves and their countries, but sullied the Olympic ideals. Every two years the world comes together to celebrate the best of their athletes. The best. And you'd better be. Of course, badminton wasn't the only example of bad sportsmanship. Two other competitors have been sent home for thoughtlessly Tweeting racist or otherwise inflammatory comments about other athletes. Do young people still not realize how quickly everything they post on line can go viral and is forever? Even if they delete it, it can be found in an archive, somewhere. Now, I am guilty of regretting a thing or two I've posted, but I own up to that and try to be very careful when I talk about people I actually know. There may be some value in "trash-talk" on the field, but such nonsense does not belong on Twitter or Facebook, especially when the ENTIRE WORLD is watching.

See? I had no control over posting that. Wow. I almost forgot how hot Val used to be. And now that I've posted from a movie, I suppose I should touch on the most ridiculous scandal rocking Hollywood, which conveniently ties in with the photo as it's about vampire leaving the zombie who cheated on him. Wait... WTF!?!? I don't give a crap about two no-talent uggos and neither should you. Sweet Hephaestus, I'm sick of hearing about those two and their terrible, terrible movies. Actually, I'm kind of glad they broke up. Imagine the baby those two would make:

KPAT, Jr.

Aye Carumba! Isn't Photoshop a wonderful tool for telling photographic lies?

What other non-fast-food-related nonsense is going on? I know. Sight and Sound magazine has published it's once-a-decade "100 Best Films List" and for the first time in fifty years, Orson Welle's masterpiece Citizen Kane has be demoted to number two, replaced by Alfred Hitchcock's masterpiece, Vertigo (via). While I love both of those movies, they usually hover a bit lower on my personal Top Five. My personal Number One is a perfect example of delightful nonsense, Howard Hawkes' madcap comedy Bringing Up Baby, starring Katherine Hepburn and Cary Grant; both gorgeous and both at the height of their comedic prowess. A dinosaur bone; a rude little Terrier; a dowager Aunt; an eccentric heiress; a big-game hunter; torn jackets; frilly housecoats and not one, but two leopards, all add up to a fast-talking series of ridiculously improbable events that end in an even more improbably happy way. Critics were cold, though over the years (much like Vertigo), it's genius has come to be acknowledged and it regularly shows up in Top Ten lists.

Now that's some Hollywood nonsense.

I think I need to try my hand at writing a modern madcap comedy. The last one that really worked was Peter Bogdonavich's What's Up, Doc? in 1972, again featuring a cast of actors at the peak of their comedic prowess, including Barbra Streisand; the then muy caliente Ryan O'Neal; Kenneth Mars; Austin Pendleton and the film debut of the genius that was Madeline Kahn. Four identical plaid suitcases at the same San Francisco hotel are the cause of the mayhem. Thieves, spies, musicologists and an insane car chase are just some of the silliness that makes What's Up, Doc? Bogdonavich's second funniest comedy (his best being Paper Moon).

Still, nothing comes close to the nonsense of the Pythons. Oh, how I love them.

There. That's better. My silly self is most satisfied and I am smiling once again. Nu? The next time I need a nonsense break, we'll revisit MST3K.

More, anon.
Prospero