Review: "A Million Ways to Die in the West"

Seth MacFarlane, Charlize Theron & Liam Neeson

Director Seth MacFarlane's sophomore feature (following the hilarious and heartfelt Ted) is the deliberately anachronistic Comedy Western, A Million Ways to Die in the West. To be perfectly honest, while it's not as good as Ted (it's missing much of that movie's good-naturedness) it does have much more than a few very, VERY funny moments and visuals. Peppered with the kind of trademark non-sequiturs and throwaway jokes MacFarlane uses on his animated series "Family Guy," A Million Ways... never wastes any opportunity to gross us out, make us squeal in discomfort or belly-laugh at something outrageous. 

MacFarlane is Albert, a dirt poor, bad sheep farmer (his sheep have a tendency to wander any and everywhere) whose girlfriend Louise (Amanda Seyfried) dumps him after he talks his way out of a gun fight with a neighbor by offering a cash settlement. His best friend Edward (Giovanni Ribisi) is in love with foul-mouthed prostitute Ruth (Sarah Silverman) but they can offer no consolation when Louise takes up with wealthy owner of the Moustachery,  Foy (Neil Patrick Harris). Meanwhile, outlaw Clinch (Liam Neeson) sends his wife Anna (Charlize Theron) with one of his boys to pose as brother and sister in the Arizona town where Albert lives, while he hides out after murdering a prospector. A ridiculous barfight (started by Anna's 'brother') eventually leads to friendship and romance between Albert and Anna. 

There isn't much new, plot-wise in A Million Ways... We all know how it's going to end as soon as Anna and Albert meet. And while the modern dialogue (complete with 21st Century teen slang) is a bit jarring at first and the cartoon violence always ends in horrific deaths and/or mutilations, they somehow manage to work together, despite every indication that they shouldn't. There are plenty of racist jokes (the shooting gallery at the county fair is called "Shoot the Runaway Slave" and a scene involving Cochise is loaded with 'Indian' gibberish)  and nonsense (ingredients in a 'health tonic' include mercury and red flannel, while the sight of a dollar bill has the townsfolk 'oohing' in reverence) and a ton of very funny, quick and mostly uncredited cameos (think Jane Weidlin in Clue), the funniest of which involves a beloved character actor recreating his most iconic movie role for yet another anachronistic gag. My three companions (M, Dear D and Stephanie) all laughed a lot (often missing bits of dialog because of it), though D was a bit put off by Silverman's very explicit descriptions of her work day. The performances are all fine and MacFarlane uses his adorableness to it's fullest extent. D also thought Theron wasn't interested or interesting for the first half of her performance, but I think that was a deliberate choice. Oh - and there's a big musical number about... mustaches! And an obviously Salvador Dali-inspired hallucination scene that is pure genius!

Interestingly, while I was undoubtedly the oldest among my companions, we were collectively among the youngest members of the matinee audience. And surprisingly, the older folks seemed to enjoy it almost as much as we did. I expected at least two or three couples to walk out, but none of them did so, though I heard an older man behind us make two funny remarks. The first was "This is the craziest movie I ever saw!" and the second was "Whose idea was it to see this, again?" I'm guessing he's never seen The Forbidden Zone. And I would be remiss if I didn't mention that all of the nonsense is made so much funnier by Joel McNeely's dead-on, sweeping Western score.

If you are a fan of MacFarlane's other works (I definitely am), you will most certainly enjoy A Million Ways to Die in the West. If outrageous, gross-out, nonsense comedy isn't your thing, you probably won't. *** (Three Out of Four Stars). Rated 'R for "strong crude and sexual content, language throughout, some violence and drug material." The Red-Band trailer below is definitely NSFW and features several clips that do not actually appear in the movie (I HATE that!).

More, anon. 

Prospero

Big 5 Oscar Picks

Oops! Wrong Oscar!

So, between my mother's most recent health scare and my exhaustion thanks to dealing with it, I really haven't posted much this week. But since tomorrow brings us the 85th Annual Academy Awards, I thought I should at least post my annual picks. 

While I won't apologize for making a joke about Oscar Pistorius, I won't judge him until I hear all the facts (unlike Casey Anthony; Jodi Arias and Drew Peterson). But that's not what tonight's post is about.

Tonight is about the impending Oscars and my picks for the 5 Big Awards (and a few others). As always, I'll be listing What Will Win; What Should Win and the Long Shot. And as always, I'll be asking you not to place any bets based on my picks, because I am never 100% accurate (though I did manage to get most of last year's Big 5 right, if I remember correctly -- and weren't too lazy to go back and look). 

So, without further ado, here are my picks:

Best Actor (Supporting Role):

Who Should Win -- Robert Di Niro in Silver Linings Playbook. Giving his least affected performance in years, Di Niro is simply excellent.

Who Will Win -- Alan Arkin in Argo. Arkin has been around a long time and will win for his body of work.

Long Shot -- Philip Seymour Hoffman in The Master. A simply astonishing performance from one of America's best living actors.

Best Actress (Supporting Role):

Who Should Win -- Sally Field in Lincoln. We really liked her a long time ago. Despite being all wrong as Aunt May in The Amazing Spider-Man, Field is more than just 'good' as Mary Todd Lincoln in Spielberg's biopic.

Who Will Win -- Anne Hathaway in Les Miserables. Her performance, while brief, was the best part of Tom Hooper's misguided adaptation of the stage hit.

Long Shot -- Jacki Weaver in Silver Linings Playbook. Who? The Australian star is completely unknown in the U.S. and very unlikely to win.

Best Actor:

Who Should Win -- Denzel Washington in Flight. Washington was nothing less than amazing as an alcoholic pilot who lands a plane and saves it's passengers against all odds.

Who Will Win -- Daniel Day Lewis in Lincoln. Did anyone doubt they were watching the real Lincoln?

Long Shot -- Bradley Cooper in Silver Linings Playbook. Cooper is still young with many great roles ahead of him.

Best Actress:

Who Should Win -- Jennifer Lawrence in Silver Linings Playbook. Lawrence just gets better and better with each film she makes and she shines here.

Who Will Win -- Jessica Chastain in Zero Dark Thirty. As the woman who found Bin Laden, Chastain more than makes up for her performance in the ridiculous Mama.

Long Shot -- Quvenzhane Wallis in Beasts of the Southern Wild. No child has ever won in this category, despite the 9 year old's brilliant performance.

Best Director:

Who Should Win -- Ang Lee for Life of Pi. Lee won for 2005's Brokeback Mountain, but his singular visual style in Life of Pi (despite the movie's 'spiritual' message) and the performance he gets out of young Suraj Sharma certainly warrant acknowledgement. 

Who Will Win -- Steven Spielberg for Lincoln. Having won for Schindler's List and Saving Private Ryan, Spielberg seems to do well with historical drama. 

Long Shot -- Behn Zeitlin for Beasts of the Southern Wild. First-time nominees rarely win in this category, no matter how wonderful their films are.

Best Picture:

What Should Win -- Argo. Ben Affleck's dramatization of the 1980 rescue of 6 hostages in Iran is a thrilling and entertaining version of a daring rescue in a very uncertain time in history.

What Will Win -- Argo. Do you really think any other movie has a chance?

Long Shot(s) -- Les Miserables/Amour -- Tom Hooper's tepid musical and Michael Haneke's tale of love among octogenarians both face uphill battles against several much better films.

Other Winners:

Animated Feature:  ParaNorman: The first animated film to feature an openly gay character, director Chris Butler's stop-motion horror comedy may well turn out to be the first animated film in a long time to beat Pixar.

Cinematography: Life of Pi. Quite simply the most gorgeously filmed movie of 2012.

Animated Short: Head Over Heels

Original Song: Hands down - Adele's 'Skyfall' from Skyfall. 

Visual Effects: The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey

Costumes: Anna Karenina

Makeup and Hairstyling: The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey

Original Screenplay: Moonrise Kingdom

Adapted Screenplay: Argo

I'll talk about the awards again, after I've turned them off in boredom half-way through - though I do have high hopes that the adorable host Seth MacFarlane will be amazing enough to keep me watching.

And just as a side note, last November I occupied a 4th row seat in the Dolby Theatre for Cirque du Soliel's Iris. I wonder what celebrity will be planting his or her butt where I planted mine.

More, anon.
Prospero

Retro Review: "Ted"

Full disclosure: My 71 year old "Walking Dead" loving mother not only adores Stewie Griffin (the fey, murderous baby on "Family Guy") - she also thinks Seth MacFarlane is "cute as a button" and has actually said to me "I wouldn't complain if you dated him." Yeah, welcome to Uncle P's world (truth be told, I wouldn't complain, either).

Anyway... MacFarlane's feature film debut,  Ted was one of this week's Friday night specials on FiOS OnDemand, so I finally got to see it and was actually pleasantly surprised. 

As a young boy, John Bennett has no friends, so when he wishes his new teddy bear was alive, magic makes it so. Fast forward and the 35 year old John (Mark Wahlberg) has a beautiful girlfriend, Lori (Mila Kunis), but still spends most of his time getting high and watching Flash Gordon  and "SpongeBob Sqaurepants" with Ted (voiced by MacFarlane, who also directed and co-wrote). John works a dead-end job at a car rental agency while Lori is a VP at a company run by the douchy Rex ("Community" and "The Soup" hottie Joel McHale). After four years together, Lori demands that Ted move out so John can move on and finally become a responsible adult. Meanwhile, creepy Donny (Giovanni Ribisi) wants Ted for his equally creepy son, no matter what the cost. 

Loaded with MacFarlane's typical lowbrow humor (this time with unedited profanity -- oh, so much profanity) and plenty of drugs, hookers, White Trash girls and completely ridiculous situations, Ted turns out to be a surprisingly heartfelt movie about friendship, love and loyalty. Seriously. Often crude, but never really mean-spirited and taking shots at every minority (much like MacFarlane's three animated series on FOX), Ted surprised me at almost every turn; had me laughing uproariously at times (the motel-room fight scene had me crying with laughter) and made references to so many 80's movies and TV shows, I almost couldn't keep count. Featuring many of MacFarlane's regulars - Alex Borstein; Patrick Warburton; Ralph Garman; Laura Vandervoort and Patrick Stewart (as the narrator) and cameos from Bill Smitrovitch; Sam J. Jones; Norah Jones; Ted Danson; Ryan Reynolds (as Warburton's boyfriend!) and Tom Skerritt, the cast is a literal smorgasbord of talented folks who aren't afraid to make fun of themselves.

Wahlberg, relying on his hometown roots with an SNL-worthy 'Bahston' accent is just terrific as John, giving in to the premise's nonsense with abandon. Kunis, as a sort-of uptight Philly girl who can't help but love her stupid, gorgeous lug, is obviously having as much fun as everyone else. MacFarlane's direction is fine and Walter Murphy's "Family Guy"-ish score provides all the right notes (pun very much intended). Of course, the real star is Ted, himself, flawlessly brought to digital life by Tippett Studios. I had no problem believing Ted was real, thanks to the truly excellent CGI FX.

Raunchy and very funny at times, Ted may not be everyone's cup of tea, but I found it to be a rather hilarious distraction with a proverbial 'heart of gold.' Rated "R" for language, violence and drug use, Ted is currently available OnDemand and on DVD/BluRay. If you are a fan of MacFarlane's irreverent animated TV shows, I'm sure you will like Ted as much as I did. If you aren't, I don't recommend you see it. **1/2 (Two and a Half Stars Out of Four). The trailer below is most definitely NSFW:

I'm actually looking forward to see how MacFarlane does hosting this year's Oscars. He certainly can't be worse than some the show's most recent hosts. He'll at least be nice to look at, if nothing else.

More, anon.
Prospero