It's On First

Sadako (Samara in the U.S.)

I have never been the athletic type, nor the kind of person who enjoys watching sports. Of course, there are exceptions to the rule - Olympic swimming, diving, gymnastics and wrestling can provide many hours of entertainment... ooh -- what a give-away! 

Of course, sport in the U.S. is all about competition, machismo and pain (well, at least when it comes to American Football). Baseball, the so-called "Great American Pastime," is just plain boring. But leave it to the Japanese to make baseball interesting. Well, at least the opening pitch. At a recent Japanese baseball game. the opening pitch was thrown by Sadako, the vengeful ghost from the Ringu series of J-Horror movies. This video (from a Facebook friend) says it all:

I would so see a game where Sadako (or Freddy, Jason, Pinhead or Pennywise) threw the opening pitch. Though I doubt they could do it quite as well as Sadako did in that clip. Freddy's glove would shred the ball; Jason would pitch it through the batter's head; Pinhead would throw a puzzle box and Pennywise would just drag the all the players down into the sewer. 

And since we're talking about Japanese horror and Japanese sensibilities, another Facebook friend posted the below clip from a Japanese "Candid Camera" style show:

Hilarious and rather mean, I don't know that I would have fallen for this, especially with the puppeteer's legs so clearly visible. Still, it's a prime example of how Japanese humor and horror seem to go hand in hand. Hmmm... kind of like Uncle P's sense of humor, when you think about it. 

Anyone know where I can get my hands on a velociraptor suit?

More, anon.
Prospero

Tipping the Scales

No One Knew? Seriously?

WWE wrestler Darren Young (quite a fine specimen of Homo-Sapien, as you can see in the figuratively flaming photo to your immediate right) today became one of the growing number of celebrities to come out as gay very casually. Last week, former child star Raven Symone came out casually on Twitter: "I can finally get married! Yay government! So proud of you!" 

My sister used to watch wrestling because she thought it was funny. She was watching ironically long before any Brooklyn Hipster d-bag was self-aware). I'm not sure if she still does. 

Anyway, neither myself nor WWE "Superstar/Hot-Slab-O-Beefcake" John Cena (whom you'll  see in the video below) think of Professional Wrestling as a sport. It's entertainment and the starting grounds for many action and comedy movie stars. Dwight "The Rock" Johnson has proven the most bankable of those who came out of the ring and onto the soundstage. Are professional wrestlers athletes? For the most part, I'd say yes. Ever see a stuntperson's body? Or a male dancer's body?

Oh, who the hell am I kidding? Most of my readers are gay men and straight women. Of course you have! And you get what I'm talking about. If you are one of my straight readers who has no actual gay friends, ask me to explain it to you later.

Young's public announcement for a TMZ reporter (who randomly got the story of his career) continues to add the kind of visibility, volume and tone we need to communicate and educate folks who are still on the fence about LGBT rights. Besides, long-time readers know just how Uncle P feels about wrestling (link may be NSFW).

Here's the thing: As I have repeatedly said: Visibility is our strength; Invisibility our weakness. I like the new casual way of coming out. Gone are the days when Ellen Degeneres; Neil Patrick Harris and Lance Bass got magazine covers for coming out. Coming out no longer has the stigma it once did. More and more str8 folks are finding out we're really not the dirty perverts the superstitious would have you believe. Still, in thousands of homes across America, there are young wrestling fans who are struggling with their sexuality. Darren Young gave those kids a voice today. He gave them hope and strength. More importantly, Young broke down yet another  barrier towards understanding and acceptance. And it helps that this was the response to the news from Cena (via):

  John Cena -- Proud of Darren Young ... Congrats on Being 1st Gay WWE Star
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Thanks for being open and happy, Darren.. And know that you most certainly saved lives today.

Now, about John Cena's brother... anyone know how I can get his number?

More, anon.
Prospero

My First Hate Comment

I've been writing Caliban's Revenge for just over four years now and I have published just about every comment I've ever received, though they are sometimes few and far between. While I have less than 60 followers, I know plenty of people who read the blog regularly. Those who do comment, are usually polite and often agree with me. And even when they don't agree, as long they are civil, I approve their comments in order to present opposing points of view. I think I've rejected two comments in all that time, both of which were rude, but neither of which were outright hateful. That changed today.

In my Gmail inbox today, I found a request for comment moderation on a "Gayest Thing" post I wrote over a year ago about wrestling. Specifically, about a video that featured hot guys in sports set to the Backstreet Boys' song 'I Want It That Way.' I posted a picture of a wrestling singlet and talked about how some wrestlers get a little 'excited' when competing. It was all in good fun and two of my gay blogger friends, Michael Offutt and Pax Romano, both left amusing comments at the time. Anyway, I opened my Gmail tonight to find to this comment waiting approval by an anonymous troll:

 "F*ck you f****t! Wrestling is the least gay sport" (the stars are mine).

Needless to say, I did not approve the comment. But I still felt I should share it because it goes to prove how far the LGBTQ community has to go in making people understand that we are not sick, evil, pedophiles who want to turn everyone gay. Seriously, I'm actually glad that men like Newt Gingrich and Bryan Brown aren't gay. Ew! And honestly, how can anyone say that "Wrestling is the least gay sport?" What other sport lets men roll around in Spandex onesies, grabbing each other's crotches and butts while trying to assert their dominance? Seems pretty gay (not to mention lots of fun) to me.

So I am dedicating the probably NSFW videos and photos below to you, Anonymous, homo-hating troll. I hope you enjoy how manly they are:

Of course, the phenomena is not just limited to wrestlers:

So, Anonymous, I guess wrestling is the least gay sport, as long as you define "gay" as men who don't get boners while wrestling. Oops!

More, anon.
Prospewro

Do You Like Gladiator Movies?

Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson

Way back in 1997, Disney angered the population of an entire country when it released the animated musical Hercules. The Greeks complained that the film reduced the classic mythological hero to a buffoonish caricature. Really? Where were they when handsome American body-builder and 'actor ' Steve Reeves was making his living in terrible 1960's Italian films about the same character? And where was the uproar when Austrian strongman (and future Governator) Arnold Schwarzenegger played the role for laughs in 1969's Hercules in New York? And then there was the All-American Hercules; Kevin Sorbo in Sam Raimi's sarcastically homoerotic "Hercules: The Legendary Adventures," which ran on American cable from 1995 to 1999. I don't remember any Greeks protesting that show.

So, I have to wonder: what will the Greeks think of former pro-wrestler turned family-film-star, Samoan behemoth Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson as their iconic hero? Literally dozens of industry sites are reporting that Johnson - currently on screen in the critically derided 3D actioner Journey 2: The Mysterious Island - is in talks to play the Greek demigod in director Brett Ratner's adaptation of Steve Moore's darkish graphic novel, 'Hercules: The Thracian Wars.'

I like Johnson. He's personable, attractive and has a rather amazing physique. He's been in both bad (Tooth Fairy) and fairly decent (The Rundown) films. On talk shows like 'Ellen,' Johnson comes across as a bright, funny, dedicated family man who wants to make movies his kids can watch. Of course, it's going to take lots and lots of Dermablend (or very expensive CGI) to cover those traditional Samoan (and Texan) tattoos. And Uncle P (among millions of gals and guys) would certainly not kick him out of bed for eating crackers.

Of course, the Greeks have other things to worry about these days, though I can't imagine they're going to happy with a Samoan actor playing a Grecian icon, given their response to the Disney film. 

As for me, my first experience with the character was the 1960's cartoon (I'm old, remember?) "The Mighty Hercules," in which Hercules resembled Superman and his best friend was a fey satyr named Newt (no relation to the current Repugnican candidate).

Ancient Greek warriors were often paired with their male lovers; the idea being that they would look out for and protect one another. It's a strategy that worked for thousands of years. While there is nothing in classic Greek mythology to suggest Hercules had such a pairing, I certainly wouldn't mind being paired with Johnson in war or peace... I'm just saying.

More, anon.
Prospero

The Gayest Thing You'll See This Week

Okay, enough sad stuff. Time to get back to my usual nonsense, don't you think?

The item of clothing on your left is known as a "wrestling singlet." They come in all sorts of designs and colors, are made of Spandex (TM) and make sure everyone at the meet knows when a wrestler is a little too excited about pinning (or getting pinned by) his opponent, if you know what I mean (wink, wink, nudge nudge). I tried to choose as demure an image as possible for this post, just so my readers wouldn't get fired when they opened it at work. But trust me when I say that GoogleImages offered up more than a few images of wrestling singlets that seemed more suited for porn sites, than my silly little blog.

Anyway, YouTube poster simianbrother added  his own tribute to all things Spandex (TM) back in 2009 but it seems to just now have caught the eye of gay news blogger Andy Towle, and consequently, mine. Here (via) is simianbrother's version of Backstreet Boys' "I Want It That Way:"

At my age, the video sort of made me feel like gay Pedobear, but I can certainly understand simianbrother's appreciation of the garment... Dear D was a wrestler in high school. I was going to make a joke about asking him to model his old uniform, but I know he'd hate me for it (ain't I a stinker?).

More, anon.
Prospero