Not All Swedes Are Blond, Norse Giants

Alexander Skarsgard

Ask a straight man 'of a certain age' to name a hot Swede and he might answer "Elke Sommer." Ask a gay man of almost any age the same the question, and he'll almost certainly answer "Alexander Skarsgard," probably best known for his role as a sexy vampire on HBO's "True Blood." And while I can definitely appreciate Mr. Skarsgard's attributes, personally, I'd rather spend an evening with his co-star, Joe Manganniello, a dark-toned, hirsute brute with a killer smile and muscles that go on for days.. TMI? Get over it. My other hirsute hottie favs include Bollywood star Hrithric Roshan; Superman Henry Cavill;  Chris Evans and Iron Man himself, Robert Downey, Jr. Hell, Goonies and Caveman co-star (and former NFL player) John Matuszak filled the bill quite nicely, back in the day.

Okay - now you know more about Uncle P's proclivities  than many of my closest friends (no, not really - did you honestly expect me to reveal information my closest friends don't already know?)

Still, when I think of Swedes; Danes and Norwegians, I somehow always conjure up an image of Dolph Lundgren. But a video of members of the Swedish Marines lip-dubbing "Greased Lighting" from the film version of the musical Grease has proven me so very wrong. Brunets easily outnumber blonds in the viral video making its way around the Internet. See for yourselves:

Personally, hair color means far less to me than hair coverage. Damn! I've over-shared again. Anyway, I'd love to see a Gay Bear version of "The Bare Necessities," if only to hear the whizzing sound of Walt spinning in his supposedly icy vault.

More, anon.
Prospero

The Gayest Videos You'll See This WeeK

Mr. Gay World 2013, Chris Olwage of New Zealand

Generally, I hate beauty pageants. That's right - I despise something a lot of gay men adore. Miss America; Miss USA; Miss World; Miss Universe... all of them are rubbish, as far as I'm concerned. They not only bore me to death, but promote sexist stereotypes and reduce their contestants to far less than the sum of their parts. 

I particularly hate children's pageants. You know that pedophiles are regularly masturbating to episodes of 'Toddlers in Tiaras," right? Ugh! The sexualization of children in such events sickens me to no end. Images of the late Jon Benet Ramsey literally turn my stomach. And don't even get me started on Honey Boo-Boo and 'Dance Moms.' I'll cut a bitch! Beauty pageants exemplify everything that's wrong with modern societal values. Don't get me wrong, I'm all for physical beauty. But there's got to be more. As the saying goes, "Beauty is only skin deep." And really... if you're pretty, we better be able to have an intelligent conversation afterwards.

This past weekend saw the 'Mr. Gay World Pageant,' in which gay men from around the globe competed for the 'coveted' title. Needless to say, there wasn't a Bear among the contestants. Every one of them was young, trim and fit. It may has well have been the 'Mr. Ambercrombie and Fitch World Pageant.' 

This year's winner, a Kiwi by the name of Chris Olwage (who's 'five-head' is even worse than Josh Duhamel's) won. His talent? Dancing en pointe, something exceedingly rare among male dancers. That's not to say I have anything against men dancing en pointe. Far from it (though I can't help but compare my own feet - ruined by years of dancing in musical theatre - to the feet of ballerinas I met while working for the NYC Ballet... ick!). And while Olwage has an amazing body, give me a fuzzy, beefy Bear over a skinny dancer any day. Below (via) is Olwage's talent entry in the contest:

And speaking of fuzzy, beefy Bears, Mumford and Sons (who had a very LGBT friendly hit not too long ago) are back with a new video for their latest single, "Hopeless Wanderer," which features former SNL hotties Jason Sudekis and Will Forte along with Jason Bateman and Ed Helms. Sudeikis and Forte (wearing a rather unflattering yak hair beard) appear to swap some spit (something they've done many times in skits on SNL), though the catchy new song has only the vaguest connections to the LGBT community. Watch it below (also via):

Personally, I'm waiting for Ricky Martin, Neil Patrick Harris and Cheyenne Jackson to collaborate on the ultimate gay song/video, written by Elton John and Matt Zarley. If you see it before I do, let me know ASAP.

More, anon.
Prospero

The Newest Gayest Music Videos You'll See This Week

Eli Lieb

There seems to have been an absolute explosion of gay recording artists releasing new songs and videos this month. 

On the heels of Steve Grand's viral hit "All-American Boy" (already touted earlier this month) comes Tom Goss' "Bears" and now (via) comes the adorable Eli Lieb with "Young Love." 

At Uncle P's age, it amazes me that so many young artists are producing fearless and truthful works about who they are. While these days I'm out to just about everybody (with the exception of a few very elderly and very Catholic aunts and uncles who just don't need to know, though I'm sure they must suspect by now), when I was Grand, Goss and Lieb's age, I was still very much closeted to all but my closest friends.

Openly gay artists like the three gentlemen cited above (along with folks like Chely Wright; Adam Lambert and Drake Jensen) give me hope that future generations of LGBT people will eventually be fully recognized as equals and celebrated for their talents and not just their sexuality. 

"If music be the food of love, play on." 

More, anon.
Prospero

The Gayest Thing You'll See This Week - NSFW Version

Johnny McGovern and 'Friends'

Self-described 'Gay Pimp;' comedian and singer Johnny McGovern has a new single out called "The Gayest of All Time." 

Johnny may be very gay, but the 'Gayest?' Not sure about that. I think Clay Aiken and Adan Lambert have him beat in that race. Still, Johnny's often tongue-in-cheek songs and music videos usually tend to poke at fun of the community of which he is so proud to be a part of, providing humor and hotness (and often some VERY hot, half-naked extras). An unabashed Bear with a predilection for featuring hot boys in his music videos, Johnny's latest features some cute twinks, lots of drag queens and a boy in a very NSFW ball cap. 

It looks like everyone involved with this shoot had a great time, though I still question whether this video is the 'Gayest of All Time.' Personally, while I love Johnny and his videos, I can think of plenty gayer clips and songs. And I'm sure you can, too. Just be careful about with whom you share them.

More, anon.

Prospero

Sterotype Schmereotype

Seriously?

Word is, people started lining up in front of the Supreme Court Building Thursday evening in order to attend the arguments in both the DOMA and Prop 8 cases, next Tuesday and Wednesday. If I could afford to spend 6 nights camped out in unseasonably cold weather, it would be on vacation with a hot, fuzzy companion to help keep me warm while Aurora Borealis shone above our heated tent.

But seriously, the next week may well prove the turning point for Marriage Equality on a national level. It's truly conceivable that the United States may actually progress into the 21st Century and join the planet's other progressive Democracies and acknowledge that not only is sexuality innate, but that Civil Rights belong to everyone. 

There are of course, many in the U.S. who (because of fear, ignorance and superstitions passed down from their parents and clergy) believe that LGBTQ people are perverted, evil sinners who flaunt their sins and try to entice intrinsically straight people (especially children) into homosexuality. These folks (probably gay, themselves) use extreme examples to perpetrate the lies they espouse. Sure, hot guys in leather ride floats in Pride parades. But hot girls with big breasts serve wings in tight T-shirts and cut-offs at Hooters, too. 

But I digress. Long-time readers know of my disdain for so-called 'Reality TV.' Manipulative; sordid; soul-sucking drek, shows like "The Bachelor;" "Survivor;" "The Apprentice;" "The Jersey Shore" and their ilk, pander to the lowest common denominator and insult all of our intelligences by their very existence. Tabloid TV seems to have taken over, making TV programming far worse than it ever was.* Unfortunately, Canadian cable channel Slice ("... the juicy channel women have been waiting for.") has lowered the bar yet another notch with their newest 'Reality' show, "Golden Gays."

Yes, this is the image we want to project to the rest of the world. Woo-hoo! We survived the plague! Yeah! We wanna get it on! Wee-haa! Viagra! This kind of crap is exactly why the Rednecks, religious radicals and Repugnicans hate us. Now, I'm not saying you shouldn't let your freak flag fly. By all means. I have no business telling anyone what to do, say, watch or participate in. I'm just saying that the sore thumb may get the most attention, but the other nine fingers end up doing all the work.

Yes, I know - this whole post comes off as an internal homophobic rant, but I swear it's really about the intentionally exaggerated circumstances created by the producers of these exceptionally horrid shows. And while I will happily admit to watching the Food Network's "Restaurant Impossible;" "Dinner Impossible" and "Chopped," those are more about my love of food than the sort of Schadenfreude in which most 'Reality' shows seem to revel.

More, anon.

Prospero

*Thankfully, scripted television has recently upped the ante with cable shows like "The Walking Dead;" "Breaking Bad;" "Dexter;" "Mad Men" and a few others.

The Gayest & Most Super Things You'll See This Week

Henry Cavill in Man of Steel

Before anyone says or assumes anything, this post is not meant to imply actor Henry Cavill is gay. His picture here is part of the 'Super' section of the post (and the 'Hot' label).

I will admit that I have been a little less than kind when it comes to director Zak Snyder's Man of Steel, Warner Brothers and DC's most recent reboot of the Superman franchise. Cavill seemed an odd choice at first, though I will be the first to admit he is gorgeous. And he's obviously buffed up since his days on "The Tudors." I saw the teaser a few months ago and grew even more dubious. But today I came across the latest trailer for Snyder's version (produced by Christopher Nolan) and it may well have changed my mind, despite the presence of the truly terrible Kevin Costner and the enormously douchey Russell Crowe. I may be late when it comes to posting this trailer, but it was new to me, today:

Moving on to truly gay stuff, James Franco has been teasing and titillating gay fans for years with his is-he-or-isn't-he? schtick. Franco recently teamed up with very gay filmmaker Travis Matthews for Interior. Leather Bar, a film which imagines what went on during the filming of the infamous 40 minute scene which was cut (and subsequently lost) from William Friedkin's polarizing 1980 film Crusing, which starred Al Pacino as a cop going undercover into the gay leather scene to catch a serial killer. I saw Cruising with the same BF who introduced me to YES. We found it depressing and decidedly unsexy. It doesn't look as if Franco and Matthews have done anything to change my opinion of that film with theirs. Trailer may be NSFW:

Hmmm.... Whatever his sexuality, Franco continues to garner a reputation as a provocateur, at the very least. 

And in a very odd segue, linking yesterday's musical post and today's Gayest Thing post, here's the latest from recording artist Aiden James. 'Hurry, Hurry' is a delightfully catchy tune and the video features scruffy cutie James singing to his muscle bear sweetheart, while waiting to meet up in the Times Square subway station:

I've added Aiden's latest CD ('Trouble with This') to my Amazon wish-list. My birthday is only 6 months away....

More, anon.
Prospero

The Gayest Santas You'll See This Week

No Wonder the Elves Work for Free

I haven't seen late night TV in a long time. Not because I'm not up, but I'm usually writing and doing other nonsense when it's on, and I DVR enough with out adding daily stuff.* I see the best of late night on line the next day, anyway. I think Leno should just hand over the reigns, already. And Letterman should probably follow. There are younger, funnier and far more clever guys ready to jump in. Jimmy Kimmel's show is often hilarious, though I've never really been a fan of his. Craig Ferguson just doesn't care and does whatever the hell he wants and I think of him as the 21st Century Ernie Kovaks (showing my age on that reference, even though Kovaks was actually before my time). Of course former SNL cast member Jimmy Fallon is a talented comedian, musician, mimic and improvisor. He has the look of youthful innocence, the sense of humor of a performer (my fellow actors/singers/dancers know exactly what that means) and the fearlessness of dirty old man. 

"What the Fudge does any of that first paragraph have to do with gay Santas?" asked everyone reading this post. Once you see the clip I've embedded, all will be clear. Of course, if you're a regular Fallon watcher (Man, I hope that there's a species of bird somewhere in the world called a 'Fallon'), you may already be familiar with the bit. And if so, please don't ruin it for others...

Anyway, knowing I wanted to post about this particular clip, I went in search of images I thought might convey the spirit of the post, as usual. So I did a Google Image search for "Gay Santa." I got some rather amusing, astounding and downright filthy results! The treasure trail... er, trove of images I found aren't for kiddies, though they or may not be SFW.

Don't judge an aging bear... you know you find at least two of those pictures hot, no matter what your sexuality. 

And now, back to late night TV. Jimmy Fallon was doing a bit in which audience members' suggestions get acted out on the show. Take a look at this and you will understand:

As they say: "Still a better love story than Twilight."

I honestly think that while I am slowly getting into the holiday spirit (especially as my holiday vacation draws nigh), it's a very different version of 'holiday spirit' than I'm used to. I'm sure it has something to do with my encroaching decrepitude, though that's only part of it. And it gets harder and harder to find gifts for people you've known forever and who already have everything they could possibly need. Of course, the pursuit is often as fun as the giving. This year is just... different. 

More, anon.
Prospero


*Confession: I do record "Chelsea Lately" every night, but they're only a half hour each and I don't always watch the guest segment, though I often watch a whole week's worth in one sitting.

The Gayest Thing You'll See This Week

William Belli and Drake Jensen

In general, I hate Country Music. Oh, there are a few classics: Pasty Cline's "Crazy;" Dolly Parton's "Jolene" and "I Will Always Love You;" Shania Twain's "Man! I Feel like a Woman." Maybe one or two more. 

Part of my problem with Country is its mostly homophobic fanbase. I say "mostly," because I know plenty of gay boys who adore the stuff. Some of them even go line dancing. For the record, Uncle P doesn't do any kind of line dancing and I'll punch any wedding DJ who plays the "Electric Slide" in the side of his or her head until he or she falls over and I can take over with real dance music - same thing goes for the GD "Chicken Dance." If I ever meet the a-hole who came up with that monstrosity, I cannot promise that I won't commit a felony of some kind. And don't even get me started on the Macarena...

Anyway, there are strides being made, even in Nashville. Canadian Bear Drake Jensen has literally been singing singing the praises of hairy men since his cover of Anne Murray's "A Little Good News" in 2001. His latest album Outlaw, is scheduled for release this coming February. The first single, a cover of Tammy Wynette's "Stand by Your Man" (another Country classic I can actually listen to without vomiting) features drag impresario William Belli. Here's the video (via - link may be NSFW):

That version is even better than this one:

Drake married his manager, Sean Morin in 2008 in Ottawa, where the two live. Jensen joins k.d. lang, Doug Stevens and Cheli Wright as one of the few out Country singers. Honestly, I'm looking forward to the day when no one's sexuality is an issue and being "out" is no longer a thing of importance. Until then, I'll continue to (you should pardon the expression) sing the praises of public figures and celebrities who openly embrace and bravely exclaim who they are.

More, anon,

Prospero

The Gayest Thing You'll See This Week + I May Eat Crow

There is a new web series about to hit the net that's being touted as "the gay 'Sex and the City'" by no less than Entertainment Weekly. Based on the blog and subsequent novel "The Great Cock Hunt," the series explores what it's like to be a young, hot gay boy in New York City in the aughts. Ben Baur, who has had small roles on "Nip/Tuck" and TV Land's dreadful "Happily Divorced," plays Alex, a 20-something twink on the prowl. The show will air in a SFW edited version on LogoTV.com and an NSFW (reportedly featuring some full-frontals) version for pay on HuntingSeason.TV starting September 12th, with free versions airing a week later. You can catch a preview on the EW link above and a longer version at the show's site, here. "Suspicious packages," indeed!

 

My personal 'wild' times came about in my mid-30's, so I can only relate to the show's premise with a different POV. Of course, I was never a twink like Alex, so I have no idea how I'll respond to the series once I get to actually see it. Uncle P can much more relate to the very amusing gay murder mystery "Where the Bears Are," currently available on Vimeo.

As for the 'eating crow' portion of tonight's post; several friends, both here and on Facebook, let me have it about last night's "Downton Abbey" post, telling me that not only should I not judge a book by its cover but that I would actually enjoy it. "A campy soap with Maggie Smith rolling her eyes in the background..." "Funny, sexy and often outrageous..." "You would love it, dummy!"

Okay, I hear you guys. I'll give the show a chance. Now I just have to find time to watch the first few seasons and get all caught up. I guess this is where I should start:

More. anon,
Prospero

The Gayest Thing You'll See This Week (Bonus Post)

Matt Zarley (R) and Friend

I know I said I wouldn't be posting myself this week, but when I came across this topically political music video from hot bear Matt Zarley on Kennith in the 212, I had to share.

Mixing tropes from the 70's, hot guys, and a pretty decent song, Zarley makes some salient points (I particularly love the "Fixed News" logo).

I hope Zarley is right and one day Americans will be mature enough to elect an openly gay President. To be honest, I never thought I'd live long enough to see an African American POTUS, so who knows? Check Matt's video out, below:

More, anon.
Prospero