Saturday, April 30, 2011

There's Still Hope...


Yesterday's Royal Pain in the Ass Wedding broke the hearts of millions of hopeful princesses around the world. But that doesn't mean they should despair. There are still plenty of attractive, wealthy and single royals to stalk pursue...

To your left is the rather amazingly gorgeous Carl Philip, Prince of Sweden. The soon-to-be 32 year-old son of King Carl XVI Gustav and Queen Silvia is undoubtedly Europe's hottest royal bachelor and still unattached. He has previously been romantically linked to PR maven Emma Pernald and model Sofia Helqvist. Of course, Uncle P and several of my Facebook friends wouldn't mind if we were romantically linked with Carl Philip.

Then there's 24 year-old cutie-pi,e Prince Philippos of Greece and Denmark. There isn't much to tell about the baby-faced Prince, who attended Georgetown University, among several colleges. If Philippos is a bit too young, there's always 27 year-old Prince Amedeo of Belgium. Currently working at Deloitte in NYC, Amedeo has managed to keep a rather low profile, as well.

Not good enough? There are always Princess Grace's grandsons. The sons of Princess Caroline of Monaco, Pierre and Andrea Casiraghi are 23 and 26, respectively. Rich, single and the descendants of an American actress who married well, Pierre and Andrea have done a much better job of staying out of the tabloids than their mother and aunt.  If their uncle, Prince Albert II (whom I always assumed was gay) does not produce a legitimate heir with his fiance, South African swimmer Charlene Wittstock, then Andrea will assume the throne.

And lets not forget William's brother, Prince Henry "Harry" of Wales. The ginger lad has developed a reputation as a hell-raiser of sorts, having infamously appeared in a Nazi uniform at a Halloween party and licking a mate's nipple during a drunken revel... The closest any gay man might get to the House of Windsor, Harry has had an on-again/off-again relationship with the rather skanky-looking socialite Chelsy Davy, a beard if ever I saw one...

Last, but not least, there's Sheik Rashed bin Mohammed, the 28 year-old Prince of Dubai. Worth over $12B (yes, Billion), the young Arabian prince is not only adorable, but athletic and the heir to the throne of one of the richest countries on Earth. Damn!

While it is highly unlikely that you or I will ever even meet these bachelor princes, we can all dream, right? As the long-defunct drive-through franchise Photomat once promised - Someday, my prints will come... Wait. Wut? That may well be the worst joke I've ever posted. Oh, wait - there's still this:



Go to bed, Sleeping Beauty. Prince Charming isn't coming, the wedding is over and you weren't invited...

More, anon.
Prospero

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